Saturday, December 20, 2008
Guess what I attempted to do today? I actually went to a wedding with the knowledge that I know nessuno (no one) there! Marina kindly invited me to her wedding dinner. She's marrying un Italiano. I seriously don't know anyone there and my almost-non-existence attempt to ask someone to accompany me (obviously) didn't work out, however somehow I decided to just go. Why? I have no idea, perhaps last week in class we were discussing with Arianna about awkward situation that happens to us and what we would do if it happened to us. She once was in an Indian party, she came early and knew no one. So last week we were discussing things that we would do if we were in that situation and what's our exit plan. So in a way, I kinda have an exit plan in attending this wedding. Luckily though (praise the Lord almighty), there was Ms.3L and her boyfriend and so I had company :DI'm very happy for Marina. The couple have to go through a lot of changes to be together but I guess it's so worth it. Spoke a bit of Italian with the groom and I was introduced to his mother, Irma. One of the groom's relative is this little boy (bambino) who is darn cute, handsome, and adorable. Molto molto bello e carino! Anyways, I heard that Marina is leaving for Rome early in January. That's like a big change in life. I do wonder how I fare in the face of big changes.
Another person who is having big changes is Maria. S. She told us today that she and her husband will move to Tokyo early next year. She's been hopping from Italy, Germany, Singapore and now Japan where they don't speak the language. She's quite excited about it though. I guess in the face of the unknown, you should just get all hyped up rather than worried? I don't know if I can do that though.
Anyway, so today is the last lesson of the year, as well as the last lesson at United Square. Starting next year, the Italian Cultural Institute is moving to a new place. So with this last lesson, we had a little simple celebration. Molto semplice! Francesca sarà d'accordo. We had il panettone which I found to be quite good. It actually also felt like my last lesson. I've decided I'm not gonna continue next term, because I'll be missing classes and since right now I'm in a dire financial situation, I feel the money should be well-spent. Anyway, today I just feel contented with all of this experience learning Italian. Laura kept her promised and got her husband burn me a copy of Italian songs. Maria.S passed it to me. It's a copy that they're giving to her father so the songs, I was told, were pretty old. I think I will have much fun listening to them. I just feel thankful for the chance to meet and get to know all this people. I truly felt that when Q wished me a good Christmas before we parted ways. This person was a stranger at one time and with the many hours spent together, we can perhaps say that we are the friends from Italian class. It's true to say we are not close friends which is mea culpa (my fault) actually since I normally refuse to hang out with them outside class (you know how "social" I am), but to get to know them and get to know how nice they are, I just feel rather blessed and thankful for the opportunity. As they say, "it's my pleasure".
On other news, I am really in a dire financial situation. The only cash that is within my reach now is only 40 bucks!!! A question was asked to me, "how did it happen?". I have no freaking idea. I have become one of those people who actually don't have money. I have to survive 1 week with this and it's really tough, so I suppose I really have to tighten the belt, kinda literally *sigh* I don't really know how if I will be able to survive this. Maybe I should see it as fasting. Okay peeps, take care. I hope your days are merry :)
:) eKa @ 10:24:00 PM • 0 comments
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Hello guys. I had quite a horrendous day today though I am much calmer now. I cried 3 times this morning before lunch. Christ! The first one was rather personal and was a bit short. The second one was rather explosive and as much as I sobbed like mad, I was still so called rippling(?) that I cried again when I was calling NanSee. Sigh. Everyone is telling me that if I am so burdened and sad like this, I should leave. Mom didn't say that though. Mom said don't listen to anyone and I should trust myself. She's right. Sigh. You know I guess I'm just emotionally very very weak these days. I do hate myself for being so weak again today. God damn it! I just fell apart again and no it's not PMS as many of the guys may think. It's not. My emotional state now is really that of a pond. Even the smallest pebble thrown will make a ripple and the pond takes a long time to be calm again.I am okay now. So with such horrible morning I decided to skip the dinner and dance with the rest. I'm angry and sad and so I really can't be all social and chirpy. So when everyone had left, I did feel calmer with all the quietness and the catching up with Starfish did help. I actually manage to laugh. Starfish's phrase of the day was, "I don't give a rat ass". I told him to start a trend instead by saying, "I don't give a worm ass".
So ... sigh. I miss my mom. I have more difficulty ahead. I don't know how to deal with all of this without breaking down. Sigh. So help me God.
On other news, I went to watch The Day The Earth Stood Still with la Gioia yesterday and I love LOVE LOVE Keanu Reeves so much!!! I found the movie to be really entertaining and good even though there were lines and some of the actors' expression that made me roll my eyes. La Gioia amusingly counted how many expression Keanu had in the movie. He is known as the deadpan actor and I have to say that because of that he is perhaps the best actor to play an emotionless alien. I just find him to be really handsome. I was thinking of how many actors out there can look so cool with just a suit like the one he wore in the movie. I could only think of Will Smith actually. Aaahh ... can I get a Keanu Reeves?
I've picked up my Christmas present from Dagi today. Less treats this year, but it's okay because all the chocolates made the package quite heavy and I think it actually consumed much of her time preparing me such care package all these years. I got 2 boxes of biscuits, Santa in a snow globe and a small moose. Now I have a big moose and a small moose
On a different note. There's no homework this week but I like writing. If you know Italian well, you can help me correct my grammatical mistakes.
Il tempo è stato bello. Non ha piovuto. Lui le ha chiesto di parlare al giardino. Semplicemente perchè forse lui è stato un pò preoccupato perchè lei è stata infelice. É piacuto a lei il tempo. Il verde dei alberi. Il sole che non ha fatto caldo. Non è stata una panchina così lei è seduta sotto l'albero. Lei ha visto le formiche vicine a lei ma con lui lì, lei ha sentito in pace. Lei ha rotto qualche ramo quando hanno parlato. É piacuto proprio a lei il tempo con lui. Lui è davvero la sua aria fresca ma non vuole dirglielo. Hanno parlato per qualche tempo e poi sono ritornati. Lui ha detto, "abbiamo ancora tempo, è abbastanza per un bacio" e lui ha mosso più vicino. Ma non si sono baciati perchè lei vuole un tempo più bello per un bacio, un' occasione più bella.
:) eKa @ 8:54:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Olla peeps. Feel rather sleepy right now because Eka is not having her usual Saturday nap. Normally I would be sleeping at this hour.Met up with Ms. J and the Flying Nun today for lunch. We went to Brotzeit, the German restaurant at Vivocity. The food was not bad I feel. Yours truly managed to finish 0.3 litre of beer on her own. I was quite proud actually
Anyways ... lunch with the girls got me my first Christmas presents of this year. Well actually Dagi's present has arrived but I just haven't had the time to pick it up from the post office. The girls got me interesting stuff. One of the thing that Ms. J gave me was Tigger, which I found to be very cute and it will join the little farm I have on my bed
Well this week had its fare share of bad times but I feel that at least there's some equilibrium in my imaginary zen pond. I'm expecting ripples next week though with pebbles being thrown into it *sigh* Did manage to overcome something this week. I am not saying that I'm at the peak of the mountain but somehow I feel the worse part is more or less surmounted. I may be speaking too soon but in my own world and standard, I think I'm not bad. Especially since I was rather worried if I could actually do it but in God we trust and I really wouldn't be able to do it without the help from God almighty.
Okay, I'm gonna go and relax now, gonna watch Potter and later gonna watch The Story of the Weeping Camel. I'm glad they are showing it again because I didn't have time to watch it last time. Take care my dears.
:) eKa @ 6:34:00 PM • 0 comments
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Went to watch The Secret Life of Bees yesterday. Alone. Love it so much and I wonder why it didn't get much air time. There were many talented people in there like Dakota Fanning, Queen Latifah, Paul Bettany, as well as Jennifer Hudson and Alicia Keys. I love the story. I love the whole thing. Being the emotional me (currently), I actually teared quite a lot during the movie. It's not really all rosy and happy and I realize I really do like things to be all happy and wonderful, but I guess real life is not like that. Can't really recommend this to a guy, but even for girls, I realize this type of movie may not jell so well either. It's quite particular for some people, I suppose and for me I just love it! I did feel that the movie was based on a book and I was right. I am sure the book itself is wonderful.Today, I went to watch Bolt. Alone as well. Well, I don't want to elaborate much about it. I guess if you can't have anyone, have yourself. I have a really really bad day today. Hmm ... how about bad weeks? bad months? I've been feeling miserable constantly or as someone pointed out to me last week, "moody" that I didn't even make time for lunch with him (yeah, whatever!). Anyways so I told mom that I was watching a movie alone, after I told her that I was so boiling mad. She said how can I still concentrate watching a movie. Mom is so right, of course. My mind did wander as I was watching the movie so Bolt which is so highly praised by many people, didn't really make much impact on me *sigh* I didn't feel much for Bolt. I love Mittens' black fur but somehow she's too skinny to be lovable. Rhino was cute of course but even him failed to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside (I am so disturbed!). I felt that Rhino was quite Jack Black but Jack Black wasn't the one who voiced him. Anyway, on a better mood, I do feel I might enjoy the movie more.
So ... life has been quite tough for me. I just feel so burdened with so many things and feel that things really don't go well for me. I am so unlucky. Being so emotional, I actually had a break down on Friday and cried pretty badly in front of Lois. Poor her had to watch me be a basket case. I told her that the last time I cried that badly in that place was when Astley died *sigh* Being the nice her, she told me to let it out and said that everyone has their down time *sigh* I just fell apart there and then. Looking at it now, I thought I was such a moment of weakness. I actually felt that way the second my tears fell, but like a dam which is broken, the tears just flowed unstoppable. Some people may have noticed me and was concerned *sigh*
I just feel very very very very sad, then angry. I have lots of sadness and anger. They come and go interchangeably. So much negativity inside me. So much ... so much so that I really can't think of anything to lift me up. Some people did say the right thing, mom, dad, Lois, Oshie. They did calm me a bit but it's a whirlwind inside me. Aaarrrgghh ... I still have to deal with tomorrow! Honestly I am losing my fighting spirit. I may end up being quiet and just accept the fact that I am the stupid one and then go and cry in the corner *sigh*
:) eKa @ 10:44:00 PM • 0 comments
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Went to watch Four Christmases yesterday. I just wanted some light entertainment. It was actually just so so. Somehow with all these Love/Christmas theme movies, I got reminded of The Holiday, which I would love to watch again. I suppose because of the oh-so-hot Jude Law in there.Anyways, in Four Christmases I do love the chemistry between Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon. Vince Vaughn was of course more comedic than Reese. He was his usual self. Not necessarily a really hot guy, but he is really likable and I suppose it's always good to have a guy who can make you laugh. Alrighty, can't really say much about the movie.
I am thinking of eating a chocolate now but I am not hungry. Hmmm ... trying to resist the temptation. I have started to climb the mountain. There are times when it was smooth but most of the time, I have to say it's rather hard. Today I had a bit of tears because oh my stupidity! I actually said loudly today that if I had been smarter, half of my problems would have been gone. Being the stupid me, I seriously wonder if it's true. Do you think if you were smarter, things would be easier?
Anywho, I am never one who write things that I want for my birthday or christmas (since it's the time of present) but since I have so many wants and so stingy to part with my money, well let me just write some things here (I am allowed to anyway). The thing I really want the most is actually Canon EOS 450D and yeah I don't think anyone will get me that
:) eKa @ 8:35:00 PM • 0 comments
Friday, November 28, 2008
Watched Body of Lies today. Missed some part of the beginning *sigh* Anyway in light of the recent Mumbai bombing, Body of Lies is maybe a bit hard to swallow because there were some violent scenes and I know I'm a wuss but the shootings and bombing just felt kinda too real for comfort and then there were Leonardo's torture scenes at the climax of the movie which actually made me cover my eyes a bit.The movie's story was not bad I think. Though I think if it contains a bit of truth (we will never know, I guess), it will be damn too sick, too evil of this world. I feel the movie has a good pace because I kinda enjoy the whole story telling part. I didn't find it too long, too whiny and such. The actors were okay. I found Leonardo DiCaprio to be a bit pudgy. Well, I guess we all can stop wishing he'll spot his heartthrob look again. The best actor there which I really like is actually Mark Strong, who played a Jordanian head of intelligence agency or something like that. He just had such coolness and charisma on the screen. Maybe it's because of the role, I don't know but I guess he played it really well. I was looking forward seeing him on screen. Somehow he kinda reminded me of Gavin Rossdale
Life these days have been quite hard to bear. Went to see the doc on Tuesday and got to stay in my room the whole day. Got to sleep really well, I guess it's because of the drugs. I feel like the body is getting tired of being dragged. But I am now at the foot of the mountain and I have to start climbing. Mentally I'm kinda quite gung-ho about it but it maybe just part of my roller coaster emotion. This week Lois asked me if anything's wrong because I've been quite anti-social longer than what I had done before. Well, you can always rely on her to ask the hard awkward question. I guess the answer is just because I just still want to be alone. I don't feel like hanging out with people and hearing them or having to make small talk. On the bus today, I realize that man as much as I get pretty lonely sometime, I do heart solitude. So I guess for the time being really, I'm just gonna keep to myself. Not really seeing when this gonna ends.
Discussion of this week was adoption by single or gays. This was a topic from class last week and I asked a few people how they feel about it. It was rather interesting because they started their reasoning at the same place but ended up at different conclusion. I don't feel like elaborating this again because I had written 1 page plus of an essay (font size 10, tahoma)! For me, I kinda think that single and gays should be allowed to adopt. My decision to say yes to gay adopting is after thinking of the only gay guy I know and how if one day he decides to adopt a kid, I'm very sure he will do a good job and he's gonna be great! But after talking to these few friends of mine, I do get where they are coming from and they do make good points. What say you?
:) eKa @ 10:43:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Ardent Spirit and Untiring Liveliness
The title of the post was something that someone used to describe me this week. My first reaction was laughing out loud, rolling on the floor. That is so not me, don't you think? I mean people would most likely describe me with words like perpetual depression or sadness as well as tired looking, complainer, etc. One person even once likened me to the character Marvin the robot, in the Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy which is on TV right now. So when I was reading those lines, I did really laughHmm ... I hope you guys are in good health. Heard that my cousin is hospitalized right now
Finally got my Obama wobbler head from Vivy this week. It was bigger than I expected. Kinda happy when I got it. I felt like it was an early Christmas present
Today, had somewhat of a private lesson. Q is out of town and Rae is sick. So I had Laura all for myself. The thought of that made me so nervous yesterday because obviously I have to speak. R surprisingly made an appearance after 2 weeks being missing, but he being him, he was around for less than 1 hour, so it was not really much a disturbance for me. I thought the teachers would have prepared the other teachers well but man perhaps it's the case of the elephant in the room that Laura didn't know the important detail about R. I thought Laura had made her opinion clearer than any other teachers had and perhaps that stopped R in elaborating further which tends to happen and leaves us feeling all awkward. I wonder what would have happen if he had done so, I wonder if Laura would have called the police. Hmmm ... maybe she would have done so. Today I realize that she is feistier than her small frame may portray.
Anywho, today I feel that it was a good session though I felt my brain could have been more Italian. Sigh. Sometime I feel that my brain is not cooperating when I need it to. It happens quite often actually. Sometime I feel it only works when it wants to. Sometime it's okay this way but at other times, like in my Italian class, I wish it has been smarter or at least as smart as it's capable to. In the last post, I wrote that part of my Italian homework was to write a love song. I wrote the lyric or poem as Laura referred to it by. It had little error which made me happy but I guess because it was rather simple. She said she liked it. I don't know if she was just being nice. Some of the words were actually taken by words I heard other songs use, so I can't claim much originality. But the idea was really based on personal experience which was, I smile when I see someone whom I like. Like perhaps there are other reasons why I like him but at the end of the day when I am asked why do you like him? Rather than listing all the reasons, I would just say because when I see him I smile. Why is it so? Well I don't want to analyze it, it's just so.
There are other things that I want to say in the song, but between finding the word, trying to make things rhyme (though perhaps it's not necessary) and trying not to make it becoming an essay, I just simplified things. As I was writing the lines, I realized one day someone else will make me feel that way again. It's quite comforting. On other note, the song was written with someone in mind but as I wrote those, I begin to think of babies actually. How new mommies or daddies would perhaps just smile when they see their babies and how they are really the joy, the happiness, the ray of sunlight and their blue sky. I wonder if Laura thinks to that direction also since she's incinta (pregnant). Incinta is an interesting Italian word for me when I first heard it because by combined Indonesian and English word, one would translate it as in love in English. Kinda very sweet to express such a chapter in one's life. Ah, is that my biological clock ticking? Alright, I will speak no more and leave you with the poem which I realized, didn't actually have a title. Laura didn't notice it either and asked me about it but I am giving a title now. Wanted to title it with something that shows the essence of the poem but in the end decided to go for a more ... hmm ... more beautiful? More poetic? Anyway, here you go. Laura helped to fix a few things here and there.
| Il Mio Cielo Blu La domanda è perchè ti amo? Non sono una poetessa * |
* Ti aspetto ora * |
:) eKa @ 11:37:00 PM • 0 comments
Monday, November 17, 2008
Yeah, you do! Surely you know where is this going to lead?Got the chance to be in Orchard area earlier this evening, so I used the rare opportunity to catch an early movie and the one I watched, obviously, was Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa. I LOVE IT! I did watch the first one in the cinema and I thought it was so-so. Got to see it again on TV some weeks back and my take on it was that it wasn't as bad as when I watched it the first time. Saw the trailers for the sequel and it seemed rather interesting, so off I went.
It was really really good. Story wise, it was perhaps better than the first one because I feel each of the characters had a chance to develop and I felt that it was quite a nice job well done. It's sometime hard to address the issue of each of the characters due to time constraint and the number of characters around but I felt each of the characters do have substantial time to show off their personalities, like the penguins, King Julien, and Nanna. Of course the stories of the 4 friends were also explored and this time around, I kinda really really like the sweet-hearted Melman. Whenever I watch an animated movie with famous Hollywood actors behind the voices, I tend to picture the people and it's kinda funny for me picturing David Schwimmer, Chris Rock, and Ben Stiller and it's kinda bitter sweet remembering Bernie Mac. I was thinking Man, if there will be another Ocean's movie, it will be sad that he wouldn't be there *sigh*
So peeps, it was really really good. In term of the animation, it was really good as expected though lions and hippos walking on 2 feet did feel rather weird for me
My head is rather dizzy again
Allora, buonanotte tutti!
:) eKa @ 9:39:00 PM • 0 comments
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
2 mangoes on the strongest branch ...
Hello guys. It's been raining like crazy these few days and it's cold cold cold. I've been feeling under the weather since last week, but I still march on for one reason or the other and as much as I want to rest, I found myself waking up in the morning without any reason to see the doctor. So in conclusion, I have just been dragging myself around.Went to watch Sing to the Dawn with NanSee yesterday. I have never watched a Singapore film in a cinema before so this was my first one. I've never watched an Indonesian film in a cinema either and since Sing to the Dawn was mostly made by Indonesian, I guess this one could be counted as well. The reason why I bothered to watch this was because I actually know what Sing to the Dawn is about. I've never read the book but eons ago when I was living in Kent Ridge Hall, I was part of hall production and we did Sing to the Dawn the musical, which I thought was not bad. The songs were nice and the story was touching. I still listen to the songs in fact, from time to time. The title of the post is part of the lyric of one of the song from the musical.
However, Sing to the Dawn the animated movie was not good. Yeah, I know you know. Story wise, it was just so different and I didn't find it nice at all. Talking animals?!?! Come on! In the musical you could perhaps feel sympathy for Dawan's struggle and in this one, it's not so and what's with the boy who accompanied her at the end? Aahh, it was pretty lame. The songs were not so memorable. The animation is of course incomparable to Pixar or Disney animation however I did like some of the landscape painting which I thought was nice. I also like the wayang's animation and I love the front part of the tomb. The Indonesian's flair was quite obvious there. Despite of this animated movie is not of high quality, still I'm kinda proud that it's the Indonesian who did it. It's kinda sad that they couldn't find Singaporeans to do it, I wonder if there were no people to do it or if it's because it's too costly. When I found out that the majority of the people working on the animation were Indonesian, I kinda felt bad for Singapore and I hope Starfish and his company would do well and excel so that Singapore can really have its own made-in-Singapore animated movie. But Singapore being Singapore, it has lots of money, so it can just tell people to do things. Hmm ... will people hate me for writing that? Whatever ...
It's gonna be a tough week this week. I have a make up class on Sunday. SUNDAY!!! Aaarrgh, I was like in disbelief that the rest (the rest being Q and Rae) agreed to come. It kinda means that I should come as well, though I am having difficulties seeing how I could muster getting up, more importantly getting my brain up, on a Sunday morning! I seriously wonder if they will really come. If I am left alone there, I would be rather pissed.
Okay, I'm gonna snack now. Take care peeps. Cheerio!
:) eKa @ 9:45:00 PM • 0 comments
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Howdy peeps?The title of the post is something that I quote from Starfish, who when we were talking in msn some days ago, typed the line above. I didn't get what he meant and only after he reminded me that it's nearing the end of the year, I got what he meant. Coincidentally my nickname at that time was waiting anxiously, hope, hope, HOPE! which actually had nothing to do with what he was referring to, but it was actually quite apt to describe it.
Anyways, that nickname was actually for the wait of the US election. I kinda followed this year's US election quite intently. As mentioned previously, I am an Obama supporter and today is quite a day indeed. I was tuning to CNN for the most of the day. I am so happy that he won the election and yes I was rather anxious because despite of the polls saying he was leading, I felt that things could really have gone wrong, but he won and it's all good
On other news. I was back at the movie again yesterday. Went to watch Tropic Thunder, alone. I have been feeling anti social since last week and I still prefer to just be alone. The phrase selfish loneliness that Starfish coined, is really appropriate to describe my state being right now and you know what, I don't freaking care. It's even better if you get out of my way. Back to the movie, Tropic Thunder is one strange movie for me. I thought it was quite good, but strangely I found it was good for all the individual parts and not as a whole. I thought Robert Downey Jr was seriously a good actor. Tom Cruise was interesting in his role as a tyrant movie producer, him dancing to hip hop music was seriously a laugh for me. Ben Stiller and Jack Black were also good, because seriously for comedy, they are really top class, along with people like Jim Carrey. Story wise it was too exaggerating to my liking but I guess it was meant to be that way. Some of the dialogues were kinda hard for me to follow, with the accents and all the slang. Overall, as I said it's kinda weird for me but it was quite entertaining. There were many famous actors making appearances and no matter how silly it was, it did make for a good laugh.
So life hasn't been too rosy for me these days, though as one might say it's all in the mind. It's what you make of it. Well whatever it is, I'm not having much fun. Finding myself having to deal with more people, interesting perhaps because things can lead to other things and perhaps this is the path to point B. I don't know. Mr. A has been contacting me these days, asking me for help. He's so adamant that I do it even though I'm not sure I'm the right person for it. When I told him that, he said, stop it with all the negativity *sigh* He said I helped him once and so I could do it again. Yesterday on my way home, I couldn't help feeling, so be it, maybe he has enough faith for the two of us, remembering what Coelho said, something along the line that it you really want something, the universe will shift and gather all its power to help you and make your dream come true. Well we will see, we will see. I have to work my ass off because I don't like to fail and most importantly I don't want to fail him *sigh*.
Okay peeps, hope your days have been better than mine! Take care.
PS [06/11/08] : Got my CELI 3 certificato happy. I'm pretty thrilled. It's a proof that it's real!
:) eKa @ 9:39:00 PM • 0 comments
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