Wednesday, January 21, 2009
"The Time Has Come to Set Aside Childish Things"
Do you know where the title of the post comes from? I'll tell you soon.
Anyway, so home is tomorrow. My whole being feels like running out of this body however I still have to go through some things (tough things) first before home. I think tomorrow morning is gonna be hectic. I just hope that everything will just go smoothly and no bad news being dropped on me. So the time window for me to reach the airport tomorrow is quite tight but the flight was re-scheduled to 45 mins later which makes me quite relieved. I hope with the extra time, I am really able to get all my things and finish whatever things that I need to finish correctly and well.
Okay, so the title, where is it from? Well, if you don't know, it's from Barack Obama's inaugural speech. I did stay up last night or this morning to be exact to watch the inauguration ceremony which was actually quite fast. I have to say I was very sleepy that somehow I wasn't really captivated with the speech, or perhaps it wasn't an amazingly great speech to begin with? There were debates whether this speech was a great one. Anyways, the line above was the line that stayed in my head. On a personal level, I should really do as the line says but I have to say I am still dodging my life responsibility *sigh* Okay, I'm going home, maybe I will get more perspective at home. At least, I know I will be comforted there. It's detox time!
Allora, arrivederci tutti. Happy Chinese New Year. Take care
:) eKa @ 9:32:00 PM •
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Free Saturday - Episode 04
Hello peeps. Honestly without having to be anywhere on Saturdays, I kinda have lost the free liberating feel to it. Now I am just left with the emptiness to fill my time with and believe it or not, it's kinda depressing. I know, I am pathetic, aren't I?
Don't get me wrong. There are aspects of it that I like. For example, without having to be anywhere, I can actually afford to sleep until whenever I like. However, really without the obligation, I am kinda unable to be disciplined to go through with my own plan that like today I ended up waking up late because I was ignoring the alarm and in the end I wasn't able to get my flu vaccine because the doctor was already full. Aaaarrrgghhh ... Actually the part of not waking up early is the only thing that I like about not having classes on Saturdays. I still think if I use the free time for movies or meeting friends, they are still not a really good use of time. Gascoigne said it's a matter of whom you spent your time with but for me (maybe I am a real geek), one should really use the time to do something useful and somehow for me it's about having more things in my brain. I really need to plan out something, if not, I am really just gonna waste my life more.
Anyway, so today was like the previous free Saturdays. The movie that I watched was Changeling
. I was really ambivalent about whether or not I should watch the movie because I wanted something light and the movie just seemed heavy. In the end, I decided to go ahead with it, simply because of the many good praises about the movie, the director, Clint Eastwood, and also of course, Angelina Jolie. It turned out to be quite a nice watch. Instead of heavy, I would use emotional to describe the movie. It is really an emotional movie that I did tear a bit here and there. I thought Angelina Jolie was good, but I don't think she was exceptionally extraordinary to warrant her an award in all the awards thingy. But I haven't seen the other movies where her competitors come from. I was actually more drawn to people like John Malkovich, whom I found to be really a person with such a commanding presence, a real strong personality. I guess in any movie, I am always drawn to this kind of character. I really think he is awesome and cool. Then I still like Jeffrey Donovan, though he played one of the bad guy. After an IMDB search, I finally realized why he's so familiar (Burn Notice) :P Overall, it's quite a good watch. It's not boring at all. The pace was good. The actors and actresses acted really well and because of the nature of the story, I am sure if you watch it, you will also sympathize to the victims.
Home is in 5 days. I am half packed. Should finalize all the other things that I want to take tomorrow, but I can be so undisciplined so maybe I will end up lazing tomorrow. However I don't really have much time left.
I can't tell you how much I am so looking forward to going home. On the bus today, I was thinking that it's like I am so ready to leave this body that I use here in Singapore and just be released to be who I am, to be not so high-strung like now. I am quite in a paranoia mode actually because I keep on thinking of things that can go wrong in my remaining days here and I just can only hope that please God, please, let me leave in peace. Please God let nothing be wrong! I am so in this paranoia state that my depressing thoughts (thinking of the fact that I have to come back to Singapore) that normally comes when I am going home hasn't come yet. It normally comes when I'm going home but now it hasn't made an appearance. I guess because I still have this mountain of worry to face first. Am I not making any sense to all of you? Yes I know, I am pathetically weird.
:) eKa @ 7:34:00 PM •
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Free Saturday - Episode 03
Hello all. There's no movie today. Instead I went to the bank and gave a bail out to myself. The sum that I gave myself was quite a lot but with all the expenses, I am actually having difficulty seeing if I can manage and survive until I go home, which is in 12 days by the way. I am getting really poor but as much as I find it hard to part with some money, I keep on recalling things that Astley told me and what other people once told me. On some things I really cannot be calculative.
Yesterday, I decided to just stay in because I was too tired with everything. So though I only had little flu and cough (it wasn't really bad), I used that as an excuse to stay in bed longer. Did see the doctor and did end up paying S$38 for all the medicines but I felt that at least I would be properly medicated and my flu wouldn't drag on and on which I think has been happening all this time. I got to really rest nicely. I also went to see the optician and found out that I overused my contact lenses by around 9 months! Yes, it is by God's grace that I am not blind. So got myself new lenses and a pair of glasses. Those gonna set me back by S$300. Sigh. Being poor does suck!
Did have movie this week. Finally watched Yes Man
. Went to see it with NanSee on Tuesday. It was her treat. Hmm ... somehow I feel it's rather too sad to be accepting treats when I am poor. I mean, when I have money, I would gladly take it but when I am low on cash, it just feels rather too pathetic. But still the treat did help to ease my financial burden. I enjoyed Yes Man
very much. I can't really say that I am a fan of Jim Carrey. I don't like it when he contorted his body or facial expression, which he is famous for. So I can't remember any Jim Carrey's movies which I like a lot. Yes Man
will perhaps be the first movie of his that I really like. He's not too slapstick in this movie and he appeared as a really regular guy, one which is perhaps quite lovable. I was really interested about the theme of the movie and I have to say for someone like me who is so enclosed in my walls, this movie should be quite an inspiration to say "yes" more often. However I don't think it changes me much. It does in a way of urging me to just do the things that I want to do but even that ... well I don't know if I will take any action *sigh* Anyway, I found the movie to be really entertaining. I really like it. So many movies to watch and yet so little money *sigh*
I have to really start packing which I really don't like doing. Simply because this time around, I want to move many of my unused stuff here and to go through all those stuff and the dust and I don't know what else they have there in those old boxes are just such a turn off. I know at most it will take me only 1 hour but really I just can't make myself do it but I have to do it tomorrow nonetheless since I don't have much time left.
Hmm ... don't feel like writing much. Just watched Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter ... and Spring
on OkTo. Beautiful scenes but man how I really hate unhappy ending. So much sadness in this movie, at least for me. The repentance of the main character doesn't make me feel better and seeing the last scene, I just don't like it. I have to say that even though I don't like how some things unfold, the movie itself is a good one. Things couldn't go as I want them to, I suppose. Take care peeps!
:) eKa @ 11:21:00 PM •
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Free Saturday - Episode 02
The whole idea of sleeping without an alarm is very liberating for me, provided that time can stand still and the day doesn't move. I know what some people will say. I will get to do that when I am dead. So this morning, you could say that I wasn't actually sleeping but I just didn't want to get out of bed and I rolled, turned, closed my eyes just to be in bed longer. Got out at around 10 am and I do know that's like a waste of life but I just wanted to sleep longer. Speaking of which, doing Saturday without a nap is kinda tiring.
So today, I took myself out to watch Seven Pounds
. It was grimy, gloomy, slow moving, and I feel rather bad saying this, but it was close to boring. Some people say that Will Smith doesn't really succeed in playing dramatic roles but I feel it's the whole pace of the movie which is the downfall of Seven Pounds
. Will Smith is not a bad actor. Story wise, this movie could be interesting though I don't really agree with the whole suicide part but you see if the emotional process of why the character chose to do a suicide had been explored more and better, I may would have loved this movie more, for example like in Denzel Washington's movie, John Q
. So I feel Seven Pounds
wasted much time in showing the gloomy and mysterious side of Will Smith's character rather than exploring his reasoning or making more connections with the other characters and make them more lovable. It's quite a so so movie, mediocre perhaps.
So let's talk about the past few days. Going into yesterday, I was really worried about something that I put it in my prayers a whole lot these few days. Luckily and amazingly (praise the Lord), it went smooth sailing and okay. I am truly thankful to God but I do have to say I don't think I have prayed enough saying thank you. However yesterday did have its own ass to piss me off. Seriously, I can seriously hate people and most of the time when I have formed my opinion and judgment from something that someone has done wrong to me, it's pretty much unrepairable *sigh* Even thinking about it now makes my blood boil again. I know I have to be more forgiving but I can just really hate people!
Yesterday ended better though because I got to meet Mr. A who brought with him, his friend, another Mr. A. They wanted me to help them with something. It was Mr. A's idea actually. He thinks too highly of me *sigh* It was really really good to see him again after quite a long time. Glad to see his hair is short again. The most exciting news is that he's expecting twin!!! My goodness, I was actually so happy and excited for him. Saw pictures of his other 2 kids. They were very cute. We went to Dempsey Hill which I found to be quite a nice cozy place. Being the not-happening me, it was my first time there. I have to say, it's kinda hard to go there if you don't drive. Luckily the dads I was with drove and I was amazed to find that the parking was free. Anyways, I hope I don't disappoint Mr. A though he keeps on telling me that he just wants me to be happy doing it. We will see!
So, I didn't do anything special for the new year. I remember thinking that it's such an ordinary day. On New Year's eve, I was actually quite tired that I was thinking of sleeping early. Prayed before I slept. Asked a lot of things to God. With my mind jumping all over the place, I hope He still hears me. Oh yeah, I went to buy my first Italian book on that last day of 2008. It's so hard to find an Italian book. Life would have been easier if I had taken French or German. So with the very very limited options (like only 3 or 4 books) in Borders, I settled with Le Avventure di Pinocchio
. It's a bilingual edition, so on 1 page there's the Italian version and on the other there's the English version. Perfect for me! This way, I don't have to run to the dictionary every time :D
Oh yeah, I went to a choir concert on December 30 with Vivy. She had some free tickets and asked me along. The choir was the A CAPPELLA CHOR VILLACH. It was quite a pleasant performance and it was quite amazing to hear them perform the songs in Malay because their pronunciation were nice. Actually even for the song with the Italian lyrics, they also pronounced the words really well. So I feel it's really awesome that they could sing really well in whatever language it is.
So before I go now, let me leave you with the the picture of the new year spheres near the Esplanade. They were lighted differently and of all the colours that came, this red one was salvageable. The rest were so blurry :(
:) eKa @ 6:38:00 PM •