Saturday, August 18, 2012
Hello guys! Selamat Lebaran!It's been a real nice holiday break for Indonesia. It started yesterday with our 67th Independence day and people may take off for the entire of next week. My facebook friends in Jakarta have been commenting on how quiet the city is and of course they love it that way :) My mom herself is going to Bali tomorrow with some of my aunts and uncles. My other cousin and her parents will also spend next week in South Korea. Lebaran break can actually be a seriously stressful period in households which employ maids, nannies, and drivers. All those helps can be gone for a week or so and parents or teenagers who have never had to take care of the house found themselves having to clean after themselves, oh the horror for the rich. Of course if they are immensely rich, they will just get out of the city themselves and enjoy the break away in hotels where you get served. Anyways many people seem to be having a nice holiday break. I can't say much about me. I'm not sure what I will be doing. I think I will spend most of it in my room, watching a lot of stuff in my computer, a bad thing since I really should be learning french.
I had my last French class today. It's the last class in the advance level and I'm not continuing after this. Well because I am taking DELF preparatory class to prepare me for the B2 DELF exam. We had our first session (out of 12) yesterday evening. I'm not loving weekday classes at 7 pm to 9 pm, but we don't have a choice. I need all the help that I can get to tackle B2. Why B2? Because it's comparative to the CELI 3 exam that I did before I left my Italian class. So I want to leave my french education at the same level as my Italian one. We did the part on the listening comprehension yesterday and though I met the minimal requirement, I think I did poorly. I score 12 out the maximum 25. There are 4 parts to the test, each carries 25 points. As usual, I am approaching this strategically and I am having a hard time figuring out how to tackle the parts. The competitive me wants to get 90 and above but that does not seem attainable. So then I am eyeing on the 80 and above range and that also proves to be difficult because that would mean in each of the 4 parts I can only make a less than 5 points mistake. That is difficult because right now I think I can only safely hope that I'll get 15 in each part, which will make a total of 60. To go from 60 to 80 is hard and I don't know if this preparatory class will help :( By the way I only got C for CELI 3 but I studied on my own for it. The test will be in November. Considering this is August, it seems that we have plenty of time to get ready right? That's the thing though, one needs to put the commitment and effort and for anyone who has left the education system, one would agree with me, I think, when I say how we hate having to go back to the books and getting ready for exams :(
So anyway, yesterday we ended at 9 something and by 9 am today I was back at Alliance Française for a test that I totally didn't prepare for. Well of course I was late but I think I wasn't so badly late as compared to my usual self, I think I was less than 5 minutes late and that was because I went to the toilet first before coming to class. I heard Mr. N was being funny when he told the rest that I would be there even though I complained about having to have a test :D I think the test was difficult except for the listening part. Maybe Mr. N was being nice that he made it easy for us or perhaps there's some sort of trap somewhere there. When I saw the essay question, I did think how far we have come. The question was, what is spirituality for you and what is its place in the modern society? :) Smile, I can only smile seeing that. Imagine how you are going to answer that in your mother tongue and fill around 1.5 pages with your answer. Then imagine doing that in a new language that you are learning and at the same time trying to be sophisticated in your answer. In a way I like how my language lessons always progress into a point that got me thinking about stuff. I chose a similar topic about God and all for the orale part. Mr. N chose me to go first and XF to go second and the rest could go in turns as they please. Errr ... why me? He said because I was courageuse, that is courageous in French. We were given time to prepare but after some minutes I was like okay whatev, let's go and of course I blew it. I'm really not good in speaking. Not that I did well in the writing part, I think I was pretty sweet and idealistic in it but I think it was disjointed, repetitive, and not really putting much insight in adressing the question. As for the orale, I think Mr. N was being nice that at the end of it he said he got my point of view :P I think the best part of it was sharing about religion and my family and getting him surprised because he didn't know that side about me and perhaps didn't see that one coming :P Moments like this are some of the things I love about my classes, the fact that I managed to build connection and relationship with some of my classmates and teachers. Yes perhaps it's not long lasting but there were really moments, at least for me, in all those Saturdays when we are truly friends and we were having a good time for the 3 hours we spent together. So with that I was a bit kinda sad that this was the end of my Saturday classes. I don't know how I will deal with my Saturdays from now on. Yes, I complain about getting up early, being tired, about it being demanding and hard, yesterday and today were particularly so, but in the end I cannot deny that there were days when the classes were the best part of my week.
Movie this week was Brave which I watched because I really needed something to kinda cheer me up. I think it wasn't that amazing. The short animation before it, La Luna, was pretty smart though. Anyway, perhaps I was really not in a good place that I really needed more to amuse me and Brave didn't fulfill the task. I have to say that I didn't expect the story to be like that based on the trailer that I saw, so in a way I did get a nice surprise, but overall in the end I was feeling rather bored. So that's that. I guess perhaps I should talk about life but I don't really want to. If I can be honest, I am feeling pretty lonely, pretty sad, and of course God is nice that He gives me things or people to make me feel slightly better when I am feeling really down. I wish I can ask this and that to God but I think asking for this and that is also a form of complaining so I am trying to be strong. Maybe the universe knows me, perhaps Mr. N was right, that no matter how I feel I don't want to deal with something, when the time comes I will be right there and I will be fighting. I guess I've spoken too much. Perhaps if I shouldn't ask God to relieve me from the obstacles I have to face, I could wish for God to give me something amusing in my life, something that can be a good distraction and hopefully makes me smile. Alright, take care peeps. If you have a break in your side of the world, enjoy the holiday :)
:) eKa @ 10:58:00 PM • 0 comments
Thursday, August 09, 2012
It's National day here in Singapore. I missed most of the parade telecast on tv in favor of Downton Abbey. I am currently in love with it. It's actually being shown on the local tv now, but I had a feeling some parts of it were censored, I guess I'm right. Anyway, I think I'm sick now :( my runny nose is getting worse despite of me taking a medicine earlier :( Will I die if I take 2 tablets later instead of the 1 dosage?Anyway as the title hints, I went to watch The Bourne Legacy today. It's rather funny considering I have never watched any of the Bourne movies in the cinema, it was always on tv. I remembered watching the first Bourne movie and thought it was actually cool and Matt Damon could actually be cool. As cool as the movies were, for some reason I didn't bring myself to the cinema to watch them. I went for this one though. Why? Well because I love Edward Norton. I think I've never mentioned this to the world. It's a rather strange thing too. Edward Norton is quite a serious actor, I mean he chose pretty heavy movies to be in and I actually started to love him on the movie, The Painted Veil, which I actually watched on tv, I didn't even know there was such movie at that time. I guess it helped that his character there was this very nice noble doctor. Anyways, with Edward Norton and Jeremy Renner, The Bourne Legacy just seemed promisingly interesting. By the way, it's unfortunate I still haven't watched Jeremy Renner's The Hurt Locker, hope I'll get to it soon. I actually love The Bourne Legacy, but I think I'm being bias. I love it because Edward Norton was there. Was it good? I think the story wasn't that strong. There's a few things that don't add up. Why did the doctor suddenly went crazy and killed his colleagues? What did Jeremy Renner's character, Aaron Cross, did in the mountain in the beginning of the movie? By the way, Jeremy Renner did bring a different side of how these super soldiers are. If Jason Bourne was the serious type, I think Aaron Cross had more sense of humour in him. I think if you ever have to get stuck with one of them, being stuck with Aaron Cross would be kinda nicer :P Other comment, Manila kinda looks like Jakarta at some parts. Overall, perhaps the story and the action scenes weren't that amazing, some people may find it boring, but I was pretty entertained.
Okay, can't talk much. I'm sick, really. I wish all of us great days ahead. Take care peeps!
:) eKa @ 8:58:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, August 04, 2012
My Thursday this week felt like Friday. I had much nerves about this Thursday ever since I could see it coming but I have to say that it ended pretty well. There was more emotion than I would have expected when I left and they lingered uneasily but a good night sleep and a day away kinda wiped most that remained. It's weird how it ended, I really didn't see it coming. I often teased Gascoigne about the fact that when he left us, he gave us nothing and yet when he left people whom he spent less time with, he gave them something. One would think that it would be harder and there would be more emotion when you leave a place where you spent more time in it, a place where you have built many relationships with many people as compared to a place where you spent less time and in which you do not actually make friends for life. One would think that way, but in reality the ending was totally different for me that if you look at the ending you would have thought that I love my 2-year experience more than my 6. It's not really so. Especially in this place where I was enlighten that hate grows faster than love.My 6-year stint was life changing for me. It formed me. It was not always easy but it gave me courage and independence. However when I left, it's just like I'm done. I was so done that all I wanted was to just walk out of the door and I kinda did that. If I can justify my lack of emotion (perhaps) to the people there, well I would say it's because the people who mattered more had left me, they were gone before me. By the end of it, I would say that I was bruised and my confidence was kinda gone. Being told you're not good enough and feeling you're not appreciated can really damage you. So my 2-year experience after that is really something that I'm truly grateful for. Yes, it also had its moment when I want to throw things at some people but in the end I didn't leave feeling like I was battered. So I guess that's why I felt obliged to give the peeps something and wrote a beautiful email (if I can say so myself). So in a way, I think I perhaps kinda can understand how it was too for Gascoigne. It's just different. I am truly thankful for having experienced this 2-year stint because this experience showed that I don't suck, really! What made it even nicer even after I already felt like I was at peace with everything, was that someone actually replied my beautiful email, saying thank you and sorry that he didn't do more to make things work and if he had done so perhaps things would have been different for me. I never think of anything wrong to be attributed to this person and so for him to say those nice words made me feel that again I don't suck and no matter how people misunderstand me or do not want to even begin to understand me, I am ensured that I can actually make a connection with some people and we know that we're cool. Well, I am never one who think you can be friends with everyone, so I guess what I want to say is, for a person that I kinda feel that he's pretty cool to be saying such nice things to me, that is pretty awesome :)
So that's that. Yesterday was my break day and I really had plans to make use that day as much as I can. I really have to say that the tourist side of me really moves in a gung-ho and efficient manner. The plan was to go to the Harry Potter exhibition and visit Gardens by the Bay but it turned out into much more than that. I started the day watching Moonrise Kingdom, a movie by Wes Anderson. Now, Wes Anderson is one of those directors with a very distinct style and quirks in his stories. This movie is about 2 kids who fell in love and decided to run away together and caused all the adults in their lives to run after them. I thought it was good and funny. Quirky. Some may love it, some may not, but overall I think it was sweet. In that almost empty cinema, I actually saw a certain Dr from my past. It was such a surprise. Unfortunately I chickened out when the movie ended and I kinda ran away instead of saying "hi", even though my first instinct when I saw him was to say "hey!". It was really unexpected that I really wanted to sms some people, but I guess the point of yesterday was to get away from people that I didn't. Anyways, after the movie, I went to pray. I'm starting a new chapter in life, so I felt I need all the universe's help.
Then it was to the Harry Potter exhibition in the ArtScience Museum in Marina Bay Sands. There was also an Andy Warhol's exhibition in the same place. Considering that I got a resident's discount, I decied to just buy both tickets. It's like I pay the price for Harry Potter exhibition to get entry to both exhibitions, so why the hell not, right? The Harry Potter exhibition featured things from the movies. You go in in groups. When we started, we went into a room with the sorting hat. We had 3 kids trying out the hat and the first kid was such a gem. He's from Hong Kong and he was not shy and was awfully cute in his responses. I actually really really wanted to try the hat too but then I was too shy to ask, considering I'm an adult :( Next was the room where there were footages from all of the movies which made me feel pretty emotional. Harry Potter was really something for me. The books and the movies have transported me to a different world which I really like. After that, we were let to roam around by ourselves. Being a Harry Potter fan, being able to see all of these things up close was something. I tried to see every details and the details were amazing and it made me think that being in a movie production must be something too. Who would have thought that after the scene was shot, someone would actually keep things like the parchment where the kids signed up for Dumbledore Army safe and sound. Seriously, if you are a fan, to see everything in details is amazing, things like how the skeleton of a dementor looks like, how a snitch really looks like, how big Hagrid really is, I was a bit confused if Robbie Coltrane had to wear a fat suit to play him, I thought it was just some special effect thingy, also Hagrid's sofa is really big that if you sit on it, your feet wouldn't touch the ground. I had a really good time there. I wanted to get the wand but at S$75 a stick, I just couldn't. I was rather envious that there was an Indonesian mom who was getting it for her daughter on top of other goodies that the girl got. Indonesians are really rich *sigh*. As for the wands, Bellatrix's wand is the most unique one of all. The elder wand was beautiful. Out of the main characters, perhaps Hermione's wand was the nicest, it was the longest of the 3 if I'm not mistaken. I would most probably have chosen Snape's. It was black and cool and Snape is one of my favourite characters.
After that I went to Andy Warhol's exhibition which was of course colourful. My impression of Andy Warhol is that he's pretty hardworking and pretty contemplative and reflective in his works. It's like he saw more things than what's in front of him and he's always brought those things that he saw out, how else can you explain making things like a time capsule project. Alright, obviously I have very little knowledge about arts to make comments about it. I thought it was an interesting exhibition but I can't say I am a fan of his. His works made me feel uneasy, maybe it's the colours, maybe it's the composition but whatever it is, the more I see them the more they make me feel like I'm gonna get a nightmare. I guess, what I want to say is that we don't match :P I truly enjoyed the animal prints though, those were nice, I love those, really :) As always that happens when I get to experience things like this, I am thankful for the experience, to have had seen works of Andy Warhol :)
After which I went to Gardens by the Bay. By this time, I was already pretty tired. The whole compound is huge and in the heat of the daytime in Singapore when I was already tired, I wasn't interested to walk every mile of it. I think the weather will be the turn off for anyone to explore every part of the compound, it makes walking more tiring. So I kinda headed straight to the 2 conservatories or domes. Again, I have a resident discount for this one. Yesterday I really felt, that finally there's some benefit for being a resident of Singapore. I paid S$20 for the 2 conservatories. I didn't try the skyway because I believe I would be coming to this place more so I wasn't in a rush to try it. Now I saw that there's an individual annual pass for S$68, that is kinda really worth it! So anyway there are 2 domes, the cloud forest and flower dome. I started with the cloud forest and I was totally blown away when I got in. We were greeted with a waterfall! I remember thinking that Singapore did really good with this. It was really totally cool. To explore the cloud forest, you take the lift up and then make your way down on the path way that encirles the hill. I can imagine that my mom is gonna love it here. It was really totally cool. Afterwhich I went to the flower dome. I think the flower dome is bigger than the cloud forest. Here you are straight away greeted by the colourful landscape. I also think it's cool. By the way, both of the conservatories are literally cool so it's totally nice to be inside and get away from the humid hot outside weather. There were trees in the flower dome including the baobab trees which were rather small actually. The flowers were pretty. If I have any criticism is that there weren't much variety in the flowers. Well there were a lot but not like super a lot. In fact if you have gone to Singapore Garden Festivals, there weren't many things in the dome which are super unique. I do not know if this flower dome will have different flowers according to the seasons or such. It's just, don't count on finding tulips there or even sunflowers. There were roses but not numerously many. I don't think I see any lily. It was nice and pretty. I was blown away because such things exist in Singapore, the engineering of this project is truly quite a feat, and the concept of all of this is really unique but I don't think it beats places like the Keukenhof garden for example. The 2 places are different and it's not like one is better than the others though I will understand if someone like Keukenhof garden more. Overall, I think I was surprisingly more captivated by the cloud forest than the flower dome. To see the pictures, you can go here.
:) eKa @ 10:14:00 PM • 0 comments
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Sunday Morning With The Brother
I spent this morning with my brother. He was here for a short getaway with his friends. I think he's already in Changi now, on his way back. I asked a few things from mom but a few things let to many things including a jar of pineapple tarts :P I don't speak much or often to my brother so today is like really catching up on life. I always think that my brother's job is really glamourous but of course there's a lot of hardwork being put into it. I may not see it but I see the time he arrives home after a day work, which is very late. I don't know how he does it day after day. I do not know how we get our work ethics. I do not believe it is something that we get from our parents. Somehow though I think we have this something that I call the "moral shit kinda thing" (I used this term during the dinner talk with Starfish and the gank some weeks ago) that kinda forces us to do certain things just because it's the right thing. Anyway I think he's very very cool in his achievement recently. I understand how what he got could make some people feel unhappy or disappointed but I couldn't quite understand the unhappiness some of his colleagues have voiced out openly. I attributed it to the Indonesian mentality. In which he said that when I come back to Indonesia for good, I will die or feel crazy about it :P Somehow he feels my anti-social tendency is the achilles heel for me to work in an Indonesian environment. He said chemistry is the most important thing there and it's being put first before making profit :P I do not know if chemistry is the right english word because the Indonesian word I will use for it is "semangat kekeluargaan" and I know how deep this is in an Indonesian culture. It's not about my work, your work, everyone do their job and all will be well. It's about my work, your work should make everyone happy doing it and that harmony is very important. One may argue it makes Indonesians to be less professional but it's just really a cultural thing and I do not know if it's really a wrong thing to be keeping that much importance in harmony. However even in the example he gave me, I found that I'll screw harmony for what I think is right. If I do good and some people do not think I deserve certain things yet, I wouldn't care what they think and this kind of mentality of mine is what my brother thinks is bad in the Indonesian working environment :PHarmony aside, it turns out my brother is also the type who voices his opinion. Listening to him, I was thinking, damn there's gotta be something in the genes. The only cousin I talk quite frequently to is cousin Marlisa and the way she, my brother, and me have the courage to say what we think really make me think that perhaps it's something in the genes. I wonder how visible this trait is in other cousins. I have to say though that I feel my brother and my cousin can be snappier and harsher than me :D However, I feel that they are more forgiving afterwards than me. Again perhaps it's the Indonesian thing, that being in Indonesia, you can't just not greet or not talk to people you dislike. I wonder if I am in Indonesia, will I be forced to shed my iceberg mode. I am happy though that my cousin and my brother are like that. That means I am not crazy and also I think it takes guts for people to say what they think or feel because with saying something, we are ready for the consequences of what we say. I think instead of being less straightforward like how my mother would have liked me to be, we should train the way we think and perceive things. Even listening to my brother's story, I was telling him, well you could see it in a different way or I don't see it the way you see it. Of course who's to say it's me or my brother who has formed the right understanding of the situation. Everyone is different so everyone will undoubtedly has different opinion on things. We can only hope that we just can be wiser.
On other news, I finished reading Lord of the Flies by William Golding. Well, there's an essay on Fables that William Golding wrote but I don't feel like reading it. Lord of the Flies tells the story of a bunch of 12-year old boys and younger who got stranded on an island after a plane crash. With no adult around, they were left to survive on their own and it involved some kids getting killed because of their stupidity and games. My favorite character, Piggy, was killed and I was quite sad about it. I think I always like the underdog. As I was reading it, I was thinking of how kids really don't know what they are doing. It got me thinking of the time when I was in a place of authority over kids like these, it brought back memory of the times I have to get them in line :P So that's me as an adult reading it. I wonder how I would have felt if I had been reading it as a 12-year old. Would I have felt terribly disturbed with how the story progresses? Would I even had the courage to continue on with the pages. Anyway, yesterday I decided to get a new book and I settled on Life of Pi by Yann Martel. I went from a book about a bunch of castaways that I didn't really enjoy to another book about a castaway. It was an odd choice. I've been seeing this book for many years now and I finally decided to get it because this week I happened to see the trailer for the movie by Ang Lee. The trailer was beautiful, I will even watch it in 3D well because it's Ang Lee's first attempt in 3D. There was no dialog in the trailer though so I wondered if it's gonna be like Tom Hanks' Castaway. Well I think at least it's gonna be more beautiful. It turns out though that my dear cousin, Marlisa, sent me Pramoedya Ananta Toer's Bumi Manusia through my brother. Surprise! I really didn't expect it because I already told her not to take the trouble and I will get it when I get back but she did and I'm pretty happy. I've seen his books before in the beloved Borders (whose death is a tragedy indeed) but they were in english. Though the cover arts were great, I just feel it's super wrong if I read his books not in Indonesian. So I'm kinda glad that I have this to get me going. I will only read it after Life of Pi though, which is my 5th book this year, which will complete my goal of 5 books this year. If I can finish Bumi Manusia this year too, I think it'll be better because I would have started and ended this challenge to myself with an Indonesian book. I love this reading habit that I have sadly forgotten for many years but then when I see how the books are competing with my clothes for space, I feel sad that the space issue will be a major issue for me :( Oh well. It's been a nice Sunday meeting my brother. This coming week is a 4-day week for me. Then it's off to a new beginning. I don't want to think about it because I am already not sleeping on most nights so I shouldn't add more things that will prevent me from actually sleeping. Hope everything goes well in your universe peeps. Ciao!
:) eKa @ 8:32:00 PM • 0 comments
Sunday, July 22, 2012
MasterChef Indonesia & The Dark Knight Rises
Hello peeps, how are you doing? I'm writing this in the middle of watching MasterChef Indonesia. It's kinda on a half an hour break now (I'm not so sure how long) in anticipation of the breaking of fast in Indonesia west timezone. I am currently in love with MasterChef Indonesia. I found out about it coincidentally actually. It's the second season now and I didn't watch the first season and I didn't even know that it exists. So 2 weeks ago, I happened to be going through the Indonesian tv channels and as I tuned in to RCTI, I saw MasterChef Indonesia and what got me attracted straight away was one of the judges, Chef Juna. Coincidentally also, I happened to read an article about him some day before so I kinda had heard of him. He was seriously handsome and I think he's the hottest Indonesian man alive now! I can even get over the fact of the tattoos all over his body :P I remember texting my mom straight away telling her that he's so handsome and to tune in to RCTI :P I couldn't believe I only know this guy exists now :P I think his criticism is as deadly as his smile, but today I think I've decided that his smile is deadlier. So as I jumped half way into that first episode, I realized that the show was pretty good. Last week episodes were good as well for a tv programme but then I have to say that the cooking was bad. Last week some of the things that they had to make were gado-gado and kue lapis. They were to be judged on presentation skills. All the presentations sucks but one person. More disappointing than that, looking at their gado-gado, I may not even want to eat it, they didn't look nice :( I have high expectation as gado-gado is the only way I would ever eat vegetables whole heartedly. Then the kue lapis challenge was rather a disappointment as well. I know it's not easy to do it but I think most of them performed terribly. The example was around 3 cm high and some of them came out with like half of that height. It was so bad that I think if they bring it to the sellers in the traditional market where these would be in abundant, noone would want to sell it. So the cooking was bad, I think they did worse than MasterChef Australia Kids. However I think the show was pretty good, even though I was pretty turned off with the first elimination of the top 20 yesterday. The girls were so drama mama and they cried like mad. They are pretty young but still ... I would have expected more maturity.The way the show feels to me is totally Indonesian, which made realize how wonderful and strange it is that just by watching these characters you just feel a certain bond, you just feel like you can relate with them or the situation, like you know certain people in your world that behave or think that way or share certain characters like the contestants. I don't know if I am describing this well. Simply put, I feel Indonesia watching it and it's great to feel that way :) So the cooking was not so good, I seriously hope it will get better. We are only in week 3, so hopefully they will get better and better. I am already kinda love and somewhat don't care about certain contestants and it's one of the main ingredient for a good reality tv programme - the contestants should captivate the audience and make them care for them. I still wonder though why most of them are in the 20s, because this makes for many emotional, not level-headed youngsters. On the other side of the contestant are the judges. Now, Chef Juna has kinda been marked as the mean one. He's not as screamy as Gordon Ramsay and thank God he's way hotter but still it's such a turn off that my dear cousin dislikes him despite of me being absolutely sure that this is the type of guy my cousin likes :P Comparing to the early days of American Idol, when you have Simon Cowell as the mean one and then you have the nice Paula Abdul and the middle ground Randy Jackson, apparently there's a better formula for that. That is when all the judges can be snappy as well. We have Chef Juna whom so far I felt has been strict and playful at the same time. He has this evil laugh when he feels like the contestants gonna screw up. Then we have the pretty Chef Marinka who can dish some pretty ouch comment, so don't get fooled by her cuteness. Then we have Chef Degan who's more like the silent killer. He looks fatherly, soft spoken, but darn he's also a no bullshit kinda person. This also makes me need to comment on the God damn brainless contestants. They've been told many times that unnecessary garnish are food cost and week after week, some of them still do that mistake. It's amazing that the chefs didn't just scream at them :P Overall though, I think all the judges are actually pretty nice. Yes the comments can cut but if you see them as teachers and bosses, they're actually pretty normal. They're not doing it for the show or for kinda showing up their authority, they're doing it because they want all of them to do right, more in a teacher role. Anyway it's so interesting that I wonder how the first season was like. Chef Degan is replacing one of the judges in season 1, so I really wonder how the dynamic was like back then. I am loving it a lot and though it's not easy keeping up with its schedule every Saturday and Sunday and with my time difference, I do try to do it and when the Sunday episode ends, I cannot wait for next weekend :P It's heartening that there's something with a quality kind of entertainment in Indonesian tv. My only criticism are on the quality of the contestant and the cooking and hopefully as this season continues and as this programme continues, it will get better and better :) Also hopefully future contestants will be ones with more bones and less drama :P
So today, I am back to the cinema. It's been awhile. I went to watch The Dark Knight Rises. I am never a fan of the Batman movies because I feel they are very heavy and serious. However I also feel that many superheroes movies can be pretty shallow and I guess that's the reason I gave The Amazing Spider-Man a miss and chose The Dark Knight Rises. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. I think it's the best of the trilogy and I love it a lot. Its long running time was really testing on my bladder though. In fact there were so many people running in and out during the movie and they annoyed me a lot. Watching it in light of the shooting in America did kinda make me feel rather uneasy at the beginning. Not that I was afraid that the same thing would happen in Singapore, it's just I felt retrospective on the incident. It's reported that shooting began around 20 minutes into the movie, coinciding with a shooting scene in the movie and for the early part of the movie, I did kinda pay attention to where roughly it happened. Sigh, crazy people in America. It's always mind boggling for me that people in America can get guns easily. I guess that's the price of liberty. Anyways as the movie progressed, one of the good sign was that I found myself liking Christian Bale. He didn't come across as pretty likable for me in the previous Batman movies. Then there was Michael Caine, the butler, who got me teary eyed even from the beginning of the movie. He's a really good actor. Overall the story did make me wonder and got pretty confused on the logic of the bad guy, Bane. I had some questions that kinda got answered immediately after I thought of it. As the movie was reaching its climax, I was thinking that Marion Cotillard's character was so unnecessary and I did wonder that how come she had time to change her clothes when she was a hostage. Apparently she was part of the twist of the movie. A twist that made this movie great because I totally didn't expect it. Then coming into this movie, I was actually kinda expecting that Batman would die because of an interview Anne Hathaway did with David Letterman recently. So watching the supposedly death scene, I was thinking, well that doesn't mean he's dead, he could well be alive. Well let's just say that I am glad that the movie ends the way it is :) It's a really good one, at least that's what I think. I do not know what the hard core fans will say :)
:) eKa @ 8:43:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, July 07, 2012
Jodoh is the Indonesian word which means soulmate or "the one". However in Indonesian, this word can be used to say something is fated to be and this word is also used for other things not related to love and even for trivial things. At least that's what I, my family, and friends do. I think other Indonesians use the word the same way too. Example of things that Indonesians may use "jodoh" for are things like house, work, car, friends and for trivial things like when you went early to the nasi lemak stall before the queue was long and you saw that there were many fried eggs but when you got there you were not allowed to buy it even though the person before you could buy it, because what were left were already reserved by someone who called for it. So in this case, we could say the fried egg is nggak jodoh (not fated) with you. Yes, even in english to use the word fate in relation to a fried egg is overly dramatic. I remember one time Gascoigne was stunned that I used that word when we were just a few minutes late to a book store and it's already closed. For the malay-speaking him, the word "jodoh" is strictly for soulmate.So what's with all this "jodoh" talk. This was the post that I had been thinking and wanting to write for sometime but I couldn't. Remember of the wait I mentioned in the last post? Well due to that, I wasn't sure how things were going. However this week, I finally got answers. Let's just say that I am ending a chapter of my life and opening a new one. It feels like it's fated or as the Indonesians would say that despite all the processes and steps which felt uncertain at times, this finally comes back to me, so it's really "jodoh". I mentioned before that I've been in Singapore for 12 years now, I went from a dragon year to a dragon year again. I'm completing a cycle of the chinese calendar and I don't know what fate brings me, but as I go to the beginning of a new cycle or ending the previous one, I am also coming back to the place where I started here in Singapore. As usual, I am filled with fear and anxiety about what will come to me. People around me are excited for me and I guess many are relieved that it works out for me. I, myself, have to admit that I feel pretty relieved 'cause feeling rejected is perhaps the second worst feeling after worry or being afraid for me. I really hope that all will work out well. I guess I will be reading a lot the words of encouragement that my cousin, Marlisa, penned for me. Also, I guess I will be playing Jesus Takes The Wheel (Danny Gokey's version) and Buka Semangat Baru a lot. Also I think I will be praying a lot. I think or I hope all the fear which I am having right now will just tire me out and when the time comes, I will just feel numb. Please God help me.
This is also different from the last time I did this and I guess it's a good thing it's this way. I do wish I could have some time for myself but alas it's not to be, which makes me think maybe it's time to stop asking and just accept things as it is now. It's time to pay my due for all the blessing I have been receiving without working much for it ... perhaps. Speaking of the last time I did this and also perhaps in relation to the last post when I kinda talked about how some things need to happen so that other things can happen, well not much relation actually but I couldn't help thinking that perhaps things need to be aligned for me in some way for things to happen. Yeah it still doesn't make sense as I wrote that. It's just my random brain got me thinking that the last time I did this, Mr. N was my french teacher. He's my teacher again now. However the past few weeks, he was away on a holiday and that's when I had to endure the excruciating wait. Then last week, we finally had class with him again and this Monday I got my news. I remembered telling LM, he's like my lucky star :P which made me wonder how this gonna play out in the future because I am planning to stop attending class regularly this year. Well, I guess he'll be the first to say, "yay! I'm lucky for you but I'm sure you gonna do fine in the future" :)
Speaking of french class. Today me and XF and Phil signed up for DELF preparatory class which gonna takes place every friday evening starting 17 August. I don't know how my brain gonna work from 7 to 9 pm but since I am fearful about the exam, I think I really have to take this class. Phil failed his and he's redoing it, so it's pretty scary. It seemed we'll be getting Mr. V. I was actually kinda hoping it would be Mr. C (well perhaps a tiny bit). As discussed with XF, it's a love and hate relationship with Mr. C but I know he would whip us good. Oh well, let's just take things one step at a time. On other news, this coming week seem to gonna be pretty social. It's weird that when I am social, it becomes very social and when I'm not, it's like I'm always in my cave. Oshie is coming to town for something and we planned to meet for lunch sometime earlier next week. Then Starfish chatted with me a bit yesterday. Man! perhaps it's been 4 years since I last talked or saw him and so we're planning dinner with some of the peeps on Friday in people's favourite place Tambuah Mas. I am so glad of my achievement in making all of them like this place :D We do miss tahu telor :P Hope people will come, seriously why do they have to be so difficult? Anyway the fasting month will start soon, so it may get difficult to meet with Starfish and Gascoigne. So yeah, it'll be nice to meet all of them.
Nothing much else to say about life, same old same old. Watching Opera Van Java Awards now but the connection is not so good :( after which I think I'll be watching Indonesian Idol finale. I got hooked into it last week but I didn't watch it from beginning to end. Watching it, I have to say that the production of it is pretty awesome, especially when I think of Singapore Idol. The finale is between these 2 girls, 10 years apart from each other. Like American idol, most of the winner have been boys. In fact I think this is the first girls final. I think I am rooting for Regina, the older of the 2. I think she's very likable and no doubt the girl has some pipes :) I don't know what time result will be out though. The thing about Indonesian, it's like now people don't even try to be on time and hide the "jam karet" (rubber time) mentality. TV programmes often don't start on the time they supposed to and it changes every day, it could be 8 pm one day, and 8:15, 8:05, 8:10 the next day and so on. As for Indonesian idol last week, that live show ran pretty long, I don't know how they did it and how they had the energy to do it (was it 4 hours?). I have a 1 hour difference so it's hard for me when they end pretty late but I think even for Indonesian standard the late ending can be hard too especially since Indonesians generally start the day super early. Alright then, hope you guys have a great weekend and a great week ahead. Oh yeah, Jakarta is having a governor election next week. It seems to be pretty exciting. Too bad Jakartans living oversea don't get to vote. Okay peeps, take care! Ciao!
:) eKa @ 10:00:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, June 30, 2012
I Demand To Know What This All Mean
Hello peeps. It's been awhile since I last wrote. It's not like there weren't things that I didn't want to say. Well yeah nothing interesting happened in my life but I did have moments which got me having a soliloquy in my head. I guess in those moments, I just let the moments pass without straight away going to blogger and publish what I thought and as those moments passed, I found myself not wanting to talk about the situation anymore or not feeling that the situation was worth talking about the first time around. It's like taking a step back after the initial reaction to something and not feeling so strongly about what happened anymore after some time. I guess that's what it is. I'm not sure if it's a good thing to bottle up that much sentiments in but this blog is always about what half that bottle contains.My last post talked about a decision that I had to make. Well let's just say that the situation is evolving and at this point, I'm not sure where it's going. There's a lot of waiting and things that I don't understand that I feel like shouting, "I demand to know what this all mean". You see, the dreamy side of me likes to find reason or connection in something. Like, oh this meant to happen because of this and that. However such connection or impact of something in life will be hard to discern because only God has the full picture of anything. They say the flapping wings of a butterfly can cause a hurricane in other part of the world, but for the person who sees that butterfly flapping its wings, it takes a whole lot of imagination to link that to a hurricane somewhere. Okay, perhaps in this day and age, just a google search. I guess the self-centered me try to rationalize what happens in relation to me when instead it's perhaps about other people, not me.
It's like last week, I got a flu that just didn't go away despite of me self-medicating myself dilligently and another thing which was more serious that brought me down really bad :( Anyway, so on Monday I had to march myself to the doctor and so on the way there, wiping my nose, I wanted to scream, "I demand to know what this all mean". Side note: that happened after I wanted to scream "I hate this place" when I was in the toilet (I truly hate that toilet). So there were many questions that could run in my head, but that was what I had. Perhaps it wasn't about me, perhaps I had to be at the train at a particular time to infect someone else and so I was needed to start the chain of events. Perhaps also it was needed for me so that I could share a moment with Max when he kindly cleaned up the mess I created when I spilled my soup that I hadn't had the chance to eat all over the table and floor. Man! I wanted to cry there and then because life was just sucky at that moment and because he was there being so kind and all, I didn't. So I guess there were just that kind of things which you may not realize the effects of something you did or just by being present. However I guess the not knowing what all those things mean kinda drives me crazy. I guess it's most felt in a difficult situation. You kinda want to be comforted that there's a greater reason for what's happening, that this needs to happen for something in the future but that chain of events will be never ending and as I said, it may not be about you. Anyways, I am thankful for antibiotic this week. It totally helped me with the other thing which I didn't mention to my doctor because I was just in a denial about having to face it, but I am better now in that area so thank God.
On other more common me in life, the last movies I watched were The Dictator and Madagascar 3. The Dictator had its shares of boobs and penis. The humour is crude, typical Sacha Baron Cohen, but in a twisted way I found him to be pretty brilliant in his humour :P As for Madagascar 3, I wasn't that excited to watch it but since YeeMaggio asked me out, I thought alright. For the first time, I realized that the penguins were so cool and they're the coolest characters there. So intelligent and capable. They're totally my favourite characters of the gank now. By the way, Spider-Man 3 is on tv now and my God, James Franco is so handsome!
I've also finished reading The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, the book I mentioned in the last post. I did pretty good, I finished it in less than 1 month. I like it so much that I even slowed down the last few pages because I didn't want it to end. It's a really nice book and I found myself so captivated and it got me thinking that the last time I was this absorbed was with Harry Potter. I didn't like the ending much but I will always respect how the authors want their stories to end. There's 1 mention of Indonesia in the book when the author was describing how the shadows in one of the circus tent is like the shadow puppet show in Indonesia. I was glad that she used the Indonesian reference for this when perhaps there are other countries which have similar culture, or claim to be the original country of that culture ;) Anyway when I saw that word, it was like a bonus and it felt that it's like fate this book came my way. Yeah, I am dramatic that way. So I hope they'll make a movie out of this book and I kinda believe they will. I even has some ideas on who the actors should be. One of the characters I like the most is Marco and since he's british, I thought Matthew Lewis who played Neville Longbottom in the Harry Potter movies will be perfect for it. Well perhaps he's too young for it but since he's so handsome now, I think he'll be kinda good for it. Then I was also thinking Hugh Laurie for the role of Prospero the Enchanter. Then Hero Fiennes-Tiffin who played child Voldemort can be Bailey. Then Lost's Sayid can be Chandresh. Poppet and Widget will be hard. I thought the girl in the animated movie Brave is what Poppet will be like. The other main character other than Marco, Celia, is rather hard to cast for me :P I think Chloë Moretz perhaps can fit that character, if not perhaps she can do Isobel, but she is very very young. Anyways, really looking forward for the movie.
So I got myself a new book today. Went to Kinokuniya. I actually had a hard time deciding on a book. I found a book Jaipong Dancer which drew me because it's a non-Indonesian who wrote about this Indonesian culture. So that's admirable. In the end, I settled with Lord of the Flies by William Golding who once won the Nobel prize in literature. I have to say that factor was a real draw in getting the book. I hope it's good, well I guess it will be. I can only hope it's my taste and I'll like it.
I don't think I have written anything interesting though this post has been running long. As I said, nothing interesting happened in my life. I can only hope that things will get better for me and be more beautifu. Even so I think I am taking the more pessimistic and defensive approach in things, I normally pray so that God will protect me and shield me from bad things. I hope that is not the case for you and your life is going gloriously awesome. Take care peeps. Buonanotte!
:) eKa @ 9:52:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, June 09, 2012
I'm not having a relaxing weekend this week. I have to make a decision and it's a very hard one. Before I elaborate more (as much as I can elaborate here), let's go through certain things in my head.My french class has been one of the things in my week that I like the most. Yeah waking up and heading out to class on a Saturday morning still is kinda hard, especially when days like this morning when it rained. However, it's the place where I feel I can be the most me in my week. We talk about stuff and I get to ask myself how I feel about things. So a few weeks ago, me and XF registered ourselves for the next and last class, advanced 8. I can't believe we reach this state. I started 3 years ago. I remembered it quite clearly because I attended my beginner class for a few weeks on a friday evening and I skipped class to go on my first trip to Italy. So anyway, we have passed 3 years, and it's crazy. I did have some thoughts on what I want to do after I finish this whole thing. Of course there were other classes you can take to improve the fluency of your french which I have to admit that unfortunately I don't have. I was always thinking that I will take a break and go back to Italian class for 1-2 sessions to make sure they don't disappear and after that see what I want to do with my french education. Then it's somewhat decided that me and XF and now FL too, we would take DELF preparatory class so that we can take the DELF exam in December. My thought on that was like, wow December? So I will still be (have to still be) in Singapore in December? This is just the year, the year when I really question my whole existence in this country.
Come July 2, 2012, I would have been in this country for 12 years and that's a long time. It's one cycle of the Chinese calendar. I went from a dragon year to another dragon year. You can't help thinking what you have done (achieved) in that span of 12 years and the state of where you are now. I have had the opportunity to do quite a lot (according to me) in my 12 years here. Some of the major accomplishment are that I learn 2 new languages and I crossed many things in my life list. Then of course I also see the things that I haven't done, especially compared to my peers, those friends back from schools. As much as I am missing stuff, like the husband and the kids, I realize that I wouldn't have done all the things that I managed to do like the travelling if I have had them. So in a way, it's the give and take in your life, the one that perhaps God realizes more suited for me, hence certain things fall the way it falls. Then comes the ultimate question of, are you happy? Doesn't happily ever after come on a day to day basis? Well today, yesterday, and the weeks, and the months before, I haven't been pretty happy in life :( This leads to the argument people make, then change your life, get away from the things that make you unhappy or do not make you happy and just be happy. Do note that a thing may not bring you happiness but it does not necessarily make you unhappy, get it? Something can just make you feel nothing, it doesn't bring you happiness. Something can make you unhappy, it just sucks. Writing that, now I am thinking how best to describe how I feel. I guess things don't bring me happiness, hence I feel nothing and over prolong exposure of this feeling nothing, I start to feel unhappy because I feel life shouldn't be like this, I feel like my life can be filled with more things, meaningful things.
So with that, certain things seem to be clear regarding to the decision that I have to make this weekend. However, then it turns out there's 1 thing that makes this decision not as easy as I thought it would be. The more time I have to think about this over and over, the more I have a hard time to choose A over B. This is despite of my cousin, Marlisa, having written really nice, logical, encouraging words of advice. It struck me as very disappointing that it is not easy for me, that despite of the obvious unhappiness that I feel, I was willing to sacrifice my happiness for something else which people throughout history have said does not bring happiness. Of course perhaps there's the additional reason that I'm just being a chicken, scared of the change. I told my mom that I may have the courage to travel somewhere alone, but certain things just scare me a lot. There is the right decision and I know what that is and I cannot believe my soul is having a hard time to do what is right. Then there's the rationalization that perhaps it's not a decision to be made now, that it's not the time yet. I don't know about this because I prayed and God gives me this decision to make. I feel God is asking me, what is important Eka? Again, I am rather embarrassed that the answer is not an easy one. I feel very very torn. Right now, I feel like I'm tilting to the wrong side. I do not know what will happen to me if I decide on the wrong one. I wonder what kind of consequences from God that I have to endure later in the future, though I believe regardless of what happen God will never abandon me. I am scared. However, feeling scared means that you're doubting that God has your back. I believe the phrase, If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it. I also believe following in what God lays for you can only lead you to wonderful things. So this inclination to this dark side make me feel even more guilty. I do not know if I will have clarity on this. I don't think this is something that I can ask God to make clear for me, I feel this is the time when God asks me what is the right thing Eka? This is something that I have to choose on my own :(
Okay, so that's my weekend dilemma. On my boring life, as usual I went to the cinema. The last 2 movies I watched was What to Expect When You're Expecting and Snow White & the Huntsman. I thought What to Expect When You're Expecting was boring, this is despite of Chris Rock is in it and the handsome Rodrigo Santoro who drew me to the cinema. I didn't like Snow White & the Huntsman much as well. I thought the story was not so good. Despite of the handsome guy, Snow White is paired with the huntsman, that's just awful. I did like the forest scene though because it was beautiful. Reviews have been talking about how good Charlize Theron in it. Everytime I saw her, I kinda see Katherine Heigl. I think they really look alike. Even when I first saw the trailer for Prometheus, I thought it was Katherine Heigl.
On a more interesting thing, I've been listening to Nina Zilli's albums and they're great. I kinda love her now. I have also finished 2 books since March. I finished Ronggeng Dukuh Paruk by Ahmad Tohari, a book my dear friends back home got me for my birthday. The book which inspired the Indonesian movie, Sang Penari. I love the book so much perhaps because I haven't read any Indonesian book for a long long time. I just love reading the whole Indonesian words and being reminded of the vocabulary of the language. I love the narrative and the descriptive of the book, which I found to be very beautiful when the writer was describing a scene. The story didn't end quite happily but I am pretty satisfied with it, more satisfied than the ending of the movie. I hope to read more Indonesian books in the future, I think I should get one everytime I go home. After that I read Plum Spooky, a book Ms. J got me for my birthday as well. I finished this book faster, I think because of the bigger font size. After finishing it, I realize how I love this whole reading thing. It was a habit which I did a lot when I was young and which I abandoned in my teenager days. So last week after class, I decided to go to Kinokuniya to get a new book. The things I love from these 2 books is how the stories move, so I was looking for something like that instead of my usual style of picking a book in which I wanted something meaningful. Going around, I kinda stumbled into The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern and I decided it should be my next book. Still, I hesitated and I walked around and decided that perhaps I should settle on a more "meaningful" one, Sophie's World. This was a book that I never managed to start when Gaby had it during our NUS days, so I thought I should really read it now. I took the book, went back to the shelf where The Night Circus was located just to see it one last time and at the last minute I thought, no, I'm gonna choose The Night Circus instead. Perhaps because it seemed less serious than Sophie's World, it seemed more fun, the black cover looked chic, and the title has the word circus in it. Dad loves the circus (I think). In my younger days, we have gone to the circus, because dad brought us there, I think because he wanted to see it. I didn't even know where we were, what we were doing until the show started and it was something that I was glad to have experienced in my childhood. I went to those traditional circuses (plural for circus is circuses?), when the last performance was the animal show with the lions and tigers. They would put up cages around the ring to protect the audiences. These days with the whole animal rights thing, this kinda circus is kinda frowned upon (I think). Well I do think animals are better off in their own habitat, but still I am glad to have such experience in life. Anyways, the book is amazing and I love it so much!!! I reach the state where I do want to read the pages more and more because I want to know where all these pieces lead into and at the same time (like how I feel with Harry Potter books), I want to slow down so that this book will last longer for me. I've reached more than 100 pages since last week. It's really really good and I can see it as a movie. In fact, when I read it, I play the scene in my head. This book is written like jigsaw pieces which are going to come together and make sense, I hope :) I love how this book is structured as well, with short sections which allow me to pause and continue rather easily. So with this new found love with books and stories, I feel like setting a goal to complete 5 books this year. This is my 3rd one and we're in the middle of the year, so I think it's rather possible to reach 5 before 2013. Ronggeng Dukuh Paruk has an orange cover (I removed the cover that shows the film characters because I thought it's rather embarrassing when people see me read a book with a couple on it in the train), Plum Spooky has a blue-purple cover, The Night Circus has a black cover, so I think following the theme, my next book should have a strong color theme in the cover. We'll see :) Okay, that's pretty much it with life peeps. I wish I will be able to sleep because I haven't really :( Take care! Hope your days are more glorious than mine :)
:) eKa @ 10:11:00 PM • 1 comments
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Hello peeps. Singapore's very hot these days and I feel like dying :( It's crazy, I can't really deal with it. I have a feeling I fare better with colder weather than a hot one. So anyway, what have I been doing in Singapore these days? Well what do I do in Singapore usually? It's pretty much always filled with movies and let me just tell you about the movies that I managed to watch since the last time I wrote.I watched Dark Shadows with la Gioia last week. I wouldn't have watched the movie if not for Johnny Depp. I didn't find the trailer to be interesting and indeed I think it's not a very entertaining movie. I think Johnny Depp is a good actor as usual. He's pretty weird especially with all the roles he's been chosing. I wish he would do something normal like a romantic comedy. Just to see him normal, you know. I thought Eva Green was gorgeous. Her witch-vampire sex scene with Johnny Depp was weird :P I really can't say much about the movie. I didn't like it much. I guess it's just not really in my area of interest. The climax reminded me of Bruce Willis' dark comedy long ago, Death Becomes Her.
Next was 21 Jump Street. This one was really really good. It got me laughing a lot and it made me feel so good watching it. Jonah Hill really lost a lot of weight. If you compare him in this movie and Moneyball, the change in his body is so crazy. Channing Tatum was actually funny. I was thinking it's a good thing that he did G.I Joe before this, lest people think he can't be serious and always goofs around. The cast were great, their captain in 21 Jump Street was really funny. There's James Franco's brother there as well and he's also handsome. Their parents must have some amazing genes. I think the story was well written. It's really funny. Johnny Depp was here as well and it really showed how great of an actor he was because he's on the screen for like 5 minutes and in that 5 minutes, he really commanded the screen. They killed his character thus closing his 21 Jump Street story. I want to see a sequel but normally it's hard to make a sequel that can top the first one because what else there is to explore which can bring something totally new and different? I hope if they do it, they'll do it good.
Then on Friday, I went to watch The Raid. Alright, if you wanna follow the international title (the title that Hollywood wants it to use), it's The Raid: Redemption or in the Indonesian title, Serbuan Maut. I've been so excited about this movie when I found out about it and was wishing that it would be released commercially in Singapore. It took longer to arrive in Singapore than some other parts of the world but then it's finally out this week. It was very coincidental how I found out about this movie. If you read my posts before, you'll perhaps remember that I talked about watching the Indonesian movie, Sang Penari. I like that movie and it got me googling about Indonesian movies and I stumbled into The Raid and its raving reviews from everywhere (though Roger Ebert hates it). It came from the same people who did Merantau which was the first Indonesian movie I've ever paid money for to watch in a cinema and I watched that here in Singapore. Merantau was pretty cool but the story was pretty much in an Indonesian style, which made me roll my eyes sometime with the "sinetron" dialogs. Anyways, I still thought that that movie's actions were awesome and it's remarkable that Indonesian talents can produce that. Yeah the writer and director is not an Indonesian but considering it's made in Indonesia with Indonesian casts and crews, it's still an awesome thing. So when I heard about the The Raid being made with the same team of people, I was excited to see what they came up with and with the great reviews it's been having, I was even more excited about it.
I knew that the movie was gonna be violent. At the beginning of it, I was actually covering my eyes during the execution scene by the bad guy. I was sitting next to 2 guys and I think they may wonder why the hell I was there if I was going to cover my eyes. Seriously though, if it hasn't been an Indonesian movie, I wouldn't have gone to watch a movie in this genre with a lot of brutal fighting scenes. So anyway, I got rather desensitized as the movie went on that I didn't cover my eyes anymore. It was pretty gory at times but I do have to say it wasn't something which was given a lot of emphasis in. Well at least that's how I felt or perhaps as I said I was desensitized as the movie progressed. I thought the movie was good. It wasn't as fast moving as I expected it to be and in fact there were more dialog than I imagined to be. I guess from reading the so many reviews, I was building how the movie was going to be in my head. I didn't really get the story actually, it's weird :D Being in Singapore, I had the movie with an english subtitle but the subtitle didn't really match the Indonesian dialog. It was useful though because sometime I felt they spoke really fast or were kinda mumbling that I didn't really get what they're saying. Yeah, I know it's a worrying sign being Indonesian and not getting Indonesian completely. By the way my thought was proven true that Indonesian by nature don't really curse. We don't have a particular word to curse, as such for every "fuck" in the english subtitle, it was normally replaced with "anjing" which means dog. I guess even to curse in Indonesian, we go pretty mild. There are other things that Indonesian don't really say, for example hearing the Indonesian translation for "I love you" sounded really weird :P I'm really not sure Indonesian would seriously say "aku cinta kamu" for "I love you" :P Regardless, the movie was pretty cool, I actually want to watch it again to watch the action scenes again. They were fast and cool. I thought the best one was between the main villain fighter, Mad Dog, and the Sergeant, Jaka. I like Jaka actually because he was this nice decent leader. He reminded me of Daniel Mananta but too bad his character had to die :( Oh seeing him in the squad made me think of one thing that's not really Indonesian. I think it's pretty much non-existent to see Indonesian chinese in the army or any defence squad. I wonder if there are really Indonesian chinese in this position. I can talk about the whole cultural political reasoning behind it but I don't really want to go into that now. Back to the movie, I thought the fight scene was very cool because Mad Dog was much smaller than Jaka and so for me it was an impressive fight. Oh one thing that was true to Indonesian were the thugs. They could really come in small size and wield machetes crazily :P They're scary that way. It was well made and I wonder how they're going to top this in the sequel, especially with many of the people dead. I am looking forward for the sequel. There's news about a Hollywood remake and I hope it really happens. I will look forward to watching that one too :P
Today I watched The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (for the elderly and beautiful) and I like it. The premise of the movie was very interesting and the actors were of course these experienced wonderful famous British actors and they're amazing. I think Judi Dench was great and cute in her own way :) There's something about the travelling and the adventure that these people were having and the uncertainty they're feeling especially when they left England for India that was very relatable to me. Travelling to new places and to the unknown is always scary and it was really commendable and an inspiration that these people were brave enough to just go out and leave their world and explore a new world 'cause when you're in their age, you are perhaps longing for stability and predictable and relaxing things more than ever :P Well doesn't that what retirement mean? Anyway I think it's a nice movie. I like it though I have a feeling it's not for everyone. Some people may find it boring. I guess it's a matter of taste. I found Dark Shadows rather boring myself. Watching the movie, it kinda emphasizes my suspicion that I think India is more chaotic and crazier than Indonesia. Anyways, there was one part in the movie which I wonder if it reflects what it's like really in India. Dev Patel's character was shown making out with his girlfriend in the public and even having sex. I'm not saying that all Indians do not have sex outside marriage but I felt it's not as common and as easy as the movie made it appear to be. Well perhaps I'm too critical in this. I also wonder if the Indians really speak English that way, putting "most" before everything, like most definitely, most beautifully, most wonderfully :P One line that caught my attention ever since from the trailer was, everything will be all right in the end ... if it's not all right then it's not the end. It's like something that we have to keep on telling ourselves, isn't it? To keep the faith strong that all will be alright and fine.
So that's the movies I've watched recently. Except for Dark Shadows, I watched the rest of the movies on my own. I'm just in a real anti social mood now. I really don't feel like watching the movies with people though perhaps there are some in my world who are interested. I also don't feel like being asked for a movie and in the end having to be the one booking the tickets. I guess I find people to be quite boring these days. None really can come up with interesting conversation. So I would rather not spend some hours of my life wasting away hearing to boring stuff though of course as life is, I cannot help it many of the time :( These days, I am really most calm when I am in my room alone and be able to do my own things and not having to listen or answer to anyone. Life is not really a happy one for me right now and it's very hard for me to deal with it or to be more correct live in it. So as much as I can, I would just want to remove all unnecessary things which do not add to my happiness. None of this people actually bring something interesting or at least intellectual to my brain. If you argue, how about the comfort of friendship? Well yeah, not feeling that much as well. At the very least, I would appreciate intellectual, mind enlightening conversation but all I often got are people and their self centered issue :( I have issue too you know and did you hear me talk about it? No, because you are so absorbed in all the unimportant things in your life, even the tiny things. Ah I get all negative now. So I guess I'm gonna stop. Hope you guys have a great week ahead. Take care peeps!
:) eKa @ 9:27:00 PM • 0 comments
Saturday, May 05, 2012
As promised, I will write about my reflection of my trip to Turkey. This will also be the last post about the trip. For a complete collection of the photo, you can go here. I am sure there's some sort of saying that you should go out and see the world and expand your horizon and learn more about you and the world. You know something along that line. Well my trip to Turkey had been one that was akin to having my system shocked, especially in how muslims can be. As mentioned before, I didn't know much about this country before I left. I couldn't even point it in a map. I didn't have any expectation about the country in relation to that being a country with the majority of muslim population. I guess coming from Indonesia, it's not a big deal. It wasn't even something that registered in my head, that I was going to a country where the majority of the population is muslims. It only somewhat came to me when I was on the plane from Istanbul to Kayseri. The plane was still at a low altitute that I could see the city and the things that stood out was the minarets. They really stood out amidst all the concretes and high buildings and it dawned on me that yes this is a country where Islam has a great influence on the life of the people. It wasn't a cause for worry or anything. If there's anything, perhaps there's a feeling that I'm going somewhere where I will be familiar with some things. That thought proved to be kinda wrong.What happened was many moments of being shocked, flabbergasted, stunned, and at lost of words with how Islam is in Turkey. What with the vineyards, the presence of alcohol everywhere, and the lax rule in the mosque. Some of the words that came to my mind that an Indonesian would use to express the shock were: ya Allah, Masha'Allah, and Astaghfirullah :P By the way, I felt that Indonesian would often say Masha'Allah when they want to say Oh my God for something that is shocking even for a rather negative situation but from my googling, I'm not sure if it's the right usage. Back to the topic, if one would say the Islam in Indonesia is a moderate Islam then I would say the Islam in Turkey is a liberal Islam. It was something totally unexpected for me. Not that I was expecting a strict country but I didn't expect to see this. Take the drinking part for example. There are Indonesian muslims who drink but I believe only a small percentage would do it openly. In Turkey, it was like the norm. You go to a restaurant and you'll see people having wine or raki with their meal. By the way raki and the Efes beer are 2 things which I was really curious about but I didn't try any of them :( Back in Indonesia for Chinese New Year this year, I was surprised that the Padang restaurant, which Dewi took us to, sell beer. I wondered if there were muslims who would openly order that and drink it in the restaurant. When I told my cousin about this, she said perhaps it's only haram when people get drunk. I told mom about it and she said something along the line, oh it's good that they're not fanatic. The hotel guy I talked to said, it's because Turkey is a secular country so noone can force anyone to be religious. Well I don't find that argument to be satisfying. In Indonesia too, noone can force you to be religious though there is the annoying anarchist Islamic Defender Front (FPI) who's very judgemental and intolerant about eveything. Even them is not actually reflective or supported by the majority of Indonesian muslims. Oh just in case you don't know, Indonesia is not a muslim country. Islam does not dictate our law. We are the country with the biggest muslim population. So even though it takes me longer time to type that than to just say a muslim country, I do it because I think it's imperative to get this correct. It's important for me because I'm not a muslim and obviously I don't want to live in a country where the law is based on Islam. I just don't think that's fair for the non-muslims and I am thankful that Indonesia's foundation states clearly that we believe in God, not just a particular God.
Anyway, my point is, muslims all over the world follow the same teaching right so why does the Islam in Turkey seem so different. I know that I only spent 1 week plus there so my perception of it is totally not deep. However, from the general view that I got it just seemed so liberal. I actually had something like a faith crisis eventhough I'm not a muslim :P It's just like my whole understanding about what being a muslim is was turned upside down by seeing the muslim Turks. I wonder if among the country with a lot muslims, they see Turkey as some sort of pariah. I was thinking that if an Indonesian girl says to her Haji parents that she has a Turkish boyfriend, will the parents actually be worried thinking they're not true muslims? Anyway, at first it felt really refreshing and liberating for me. I like the fact that people don't get judged for what they do. In Indonesia, it often gets pretty suffocating, example: an Indonesian celebrity in a bikini in Bali was in the news and be judged for revealing her body. I don't believe in forcing people to be religious. I don't believe in removing all temptation so that people can be religious. I think people with a strong faith will keep their faith even when all around them are against it. So for organization like FPI to come off so strong in removing things they feel is un-Islamic feels so wrong for me. Even if they can make a pious muslim out of it but it may not be effective when the person is somewhere out there where there are more temptations. The world is not small and if we're going to close ourselves and be against everyone who's not in the same faith as us, what would we be, North Korea?
As the my trip continued, that feeling of wishing that the Islamic society in Indonesia could take the chill pill and be not so restrictive kinda tempered a bit. I don't know what it was, perhaps it's the fact that I am Asian (generally we're known to be more conservative, no?), the fact that I am Indonesian Chinese (with a family who's conservative), the fact that my 11-year Christian education successfully shaped my view on things, or the fact that I am an Indonesian. When I read about secular country, many of them try to ensure there's no excessive showing of religious belief by people. In getting to know more about secular countries, I googled here and there to get answers for some of my questions. I stumbled into Laïcité and I had a mix feeling about it. After around 11 years in a Christian school, I went to a government high school which accepts everyone. If Laïcité had been imposed then my life in that school wouldn't have been too hard for me on my first year. My first year, especially my first week was tough. I didn't know if I could survive my 3-year stay there. I went from a Christian school where we started our day with prayer, singing hymns, and reading the bible to a government school where Islam is everywhere. At the door of the classrooms and the whiteboard, there's arabic caligraphy with verses from the Quran. Some teachers come in to class and instead of saying good morning or so, they'll say "assalamualaikum" where the only response to that is the other arabic verse. Do they care that there are non-muslims in the class? No. Do they care if perhaps the non-muslims feel uncomfortable? No. Perhaps they secretly hope we see the light and convert. So that was hard for me to swallow and digest. My first year in my high school was rough but then I managed to deal with it and get to know my wonderful muslim classmates who I was able to talk to, who let me read their notes or books from the religion classes, and who are generally really nice people and do not like me less just because I am not a muslim. So when I think about them and I think about the other side of Laïcité, then I see the negative side of it. It it's imposed on the country, my school would be free of all religious items, we may not even have a musholla in the school, but it would also mean that my female classmates who would like to wear their headscarf to school would be denied of that. Then I think it's a violation of their human rights to exercise their belief. I'm also not sure I like the idea that sermons given in the mosques have to be approved by the government. While it's good that it can prevent extremism but it's also a form of censorship, isn't it? Especially if the sermons may criticize certain government's policy or officials. It just feels like instead of splitting the government and religion, it's like the government has a way in controlling the religion. So I am not sure if that kind of secularity is right.
Again I don't know, maybe it's all the facts that I mentioned earlier, but there's something about being religious in Indonesia that I treasure. Religion is infused in our lives in all aspects. We often start and end things with prayers. Religion is in the curriculum. It's everywhere though perhaps the most visible sign is Islam. As much as I do roll my eyes if some muslim organizations say something is bad or release a fatwa for something they think is bad, I do have to say some of them are not totally rejected by the non-muslims. Don't watch Lady Gaga's concert? Why, though the churches don't come out on tv to say it, I think it was perhaps mentioned during Sunday service. Even the South Korean Christians will agree with this. Stop all the raunchy songs with explicit lyrics for example. I do agree on this because imagine the horror if I have to explain the song "Jupe likes 69 the best" to ... my parents? Oh my God! So in a way, I agree with certain suggestion and advice on making our society morally sound. I just don't agree on it being too restrictive, suffocating, and most importantly have to be done in such a violent hostile way. Then of course the issue comes on who should be on the moral authority in the country and I guess that's the hard issue with the different groups. I guess for Indonesia, I just don't want Islam to be the only voice in the country, ignoring the minority. I am sure what the muslims clerics think as proper or not are the same sentiment shared by the priest and pastors in churches, the Budhist monks, and the Hindus leaders in Bali, so we are not so different.
I guess, at the end of my trip, I didn't come out of it thinking that secularity in Turkey is a totally awesome idea and Indonesia sucks. We're just different and I would like to know more about Islam in Turkey. There's so many questions that I want to ask and I would like to observe life there. I find it very very intriguing. Obviously Indonesian muslims are the not the holiest in the world but when I see the Turks, sometime it's like there's no trace in them that they're muslims. It sounds so bad writing that but really. I heard people saying this country is more Europe than Asia and it's so true. So I guess because it's not so visible, I would really like to know how it's really like behind the screen, for example what is it like in the family. Do they pray together? Are they okay with their kids marrying a non-muslim? So many questions to ask and it's very personal and so of course I can't just start shooting away on the Turks that I just met. I left the country with a lot of unsatisfied curiousity and the desire to know more. It's a country that I unexpectedly love. It is so different and yet there's a familiarity to it for me. There are things like the unexpected comfort I felt hearing adzan because it reminded me of home. Of course there's also the awesome experience. It's a country that I would really really love to visit again. I am thankful to God for this chance and I hope He'll be kind enough to grant me the chance again in the future :)
On other personal reflection. Well there's the unimportant one like right now I can actually eat cereal with milk :P There's something about white milk that made me not be able to take it. So I never ate cereal but I started on this trip and I found myself not hating it. I actually think warm milk with cereal is really nice. I have even bought cereals here in Singapore and ate them. I still don't think I can drink a glass of white milk but I think this change in me is a good thing :) I also realize that I have awesome organizational skill. I will never doubt that I have it. Awesome is perhaps open to discussion but I realize I am so much better than some people. I realize that I can be a person someone can rely on but I found myself not being able to rely on anyone easily. It's a rather hard thing to do because I will always question the methods and not have much believe when someone's methods differ from mine. Perhaps it's an OCD thing, I don't know. I also realize that there can be someone messier than me, oh my! Then I guess most importantly, I realize what kind of characters I need in a person whom I want to spend my life with. Perhaps I haven't gotten the full picture but to be able to see certain details of it I guess is important and enlightening. I know what I can stand and cannot stand and I know how I am and what I need in a partner. Maybe when I can see more and more details in it, I will finally meet my guy? *fingers crossed* If there's one thing that doesn't change is patience. Even more so, I realize how it's very very hard for me to be sincere in doing things for a group when I feel the other group members are not as contributive. Perhaps it's selfishness, perhaps it's individuality, perhaps it's simply being a bad person. I just cannot be all sincere and happy about it. I keep on thinking if I have to do this on my own and can do this on my own, why do I need all these people? Maybe it's simply being a bad person, that I want someone who can bring something to the table to be in the team. It sounds so Singaporean actually. Darn this country has crept into me, aarrgggh!
On current life news. Life has started to go back to it's depressive state. I try not to think about it much. My dad is rather unwell now. I'm not sure if it's worse or actually better than what my family try it to make it sound. I get mix signals. Anyway dad is having some tests done and hopefully we'll get a definitive course of action soon. I have to say that for the first time, I feel that my safety net is going to disappear. Especially after hearing my brother talked about the uncertainty on his future plan since dad is unwell now. It brings another thought into my mind. Things that I should really see if it's feasible to do. Then this week, I had some sort of a clash with Max. It burdened my mind so and another enlightenment came that I have to have my kids be brought up in an environment where we believe in God and have the fear of God. I had been reprimanded for allegedly forcing my belief on other people but I am what I am, what I believe and I believe in living my life a certain way and I want this for my future generations. Anyway, let's just say I am very disappointed with Max and it perhaps changed our relationship a bit. I feel I've lost all ability to be all friendly with him. We'll see. I feel like arguing because I somehow care about him that I would like him to live his life in a good way. If I don't care, then I wouldn't care about what he does. All people can say, including him, is I'm not seeing that he has his freedom to choose how to live his life. You know it's like seeing someone going to the river with a boat with holes. We all know the boat have holes. Me, I will scream my best and try to not let that person go to the river with that boat. Some people argue it's their choice, so let it be. I can't do that. If I think someone (I care) is making a mistake, I tell them. Again people argue that my definition of a mistake is different, people have a right, etc. Whatever.
I've also done the normal stuff here in Singapore. Watched The Avengers with Ms. J yesterday. As a moral support for her, we watched it in 3D Imax. I wasn't as blown away as her. I guess it's just the mental state right now that I need more things to interest me. I like Robert Downey Jr a lot though. While the movie had some cheesy lines especially coming from Samuel L Jackson's character, it did have some funny moments. Who knew that the Hulk would actually be a very important character and one of the funniest? I also didn't expect that Captain America would be the one in a leader role. Well I didn't watch his movie. I didn't watch Thor either. I just reached the state where I kinda had enough of superheroes movie. I watched this because of how I like Robert Downey Jr :P Oh I have to say that the Robyn from How I Met Your Mother was so skinny in this movie, it's crazy. I also have to say that even with Captain America and Thor which Ms. J likes a lot, I am next drawn to Jeremy Renner. Perhaps it was also boosted by his Mission Impossible's performance but he just exuded coolness :P Well I guess that's it about life peeps. Hope you guys have a great life ahead :)
:) eKa @ 1:52:00 PM • 0 comments
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