Sunday, November 14, 2010

Rough Week Happens?

It's a rough week this week. I'm down with flu. Still not totally cured but I am finally showing signs of getting better. I would be glad when this is over but I don't know if it will or how long it will take. I don't think I had enough time to rest and I think my drugs weren't strong enough. It was either that or the virus has become immune to the antibiotic I've been taking :(

I was told, "It happens Eka". Yes it does. I guess the week is rougher for me not because of the sickness alone but because of all the other things that do not go my way. That's not literally the correct way to explain it. Many things do come my way, they're just not things that I want to happen on me :( With so little energy in my body, I just want to just walk away from everything *sigh* Shit happens? Yeah, I know. A friend once even told me that shit makes flower grow. So there'll be rainbow in my sky again one day and if there isn't, there at least be a blue sky.

Was supposed to meet Ayu yesterday for dinner but in the end we couldn't make it. She needed time to spend with her family and I needed the rest. It's rather sad because I was looking forward to meet her boy, Gibran, and also because I haven't seen her since we left high school. We hope for another better time and hope it'll happen soon. The good news of this week is my best friend, Dewi, is coming to town for a short weekend trip in 2 weeks time. She'll be with her group of colleagues but I guess she'll squeeze some time to meet me. I'm so looking forward to it. I look forward meeting and talking with Indonesians friends who are nice to me. I do know some Indonesian people here, I even spend my days with Indonesians, but I just miss and need the people who get me and say there there Eka, you're cool and awesome, and there's nothing that you cannot do. I need these people to keep me sane :P Yes, I'm gonna admit it, I do have a narcissistic tendency. I think everyone does, however small.

On a cryptic note, yesterday a question was asked to someone. I don't think the person really answered the question which was asked. It wasn't a difficult question and not a particulary memorable one but my random brain brought it up this afternoon. The person who supposed to answer the question gave a very thoughtful answer, thoughtful as in it seemed that there's a lot thoughts going on into the answer. He gave reasons and all and I was thinking where's the creativity in the answer? The curiousity, the desire, the impulse, the thoughts of what if everything could be possible. That got me thinking if I am that inexperienced youngster hence I look at the world too simply or is it failure and heartache in life that can really change a person. I like to think it's the second reason. I've experienced many failures in life and I do feel that they've become such dark shadows that hover around and make you feel there's certain boundaries and limit in yout life, but you gotta shake it off right. You gotta bounce back. Though they're there, you just gotta try to see the light and push through and don't let it limit the wonderful you. My point is, I hope when I get older I will still be curious on things and be fascinated with what the world has to offer. I hope I will still always have a list of things I want to do in life and I hope I will still strive to do them all. I know when I die there'll be things on that list that I haven't done but most imperatively, I think at least I'll die with a smile reminiscing the good memories of the things that I have done.

:) eKa @ 8:03:00 PM •