Friday, March 12, 2021

Book 0 - Girl, Woman, Other

I finished reading Girl, Woman, Other by Bernardine Evaristo. I'm really quite slow now in reading due to the lack of discipline. Anyways, I mentioned this book before in one the posts; it's basically a collection of stories of women, mostly of colour, in the UK. The characters are connected in one way or another though the stories pretty much stand alone. I like the book though on some of the stories, I feel like I want to learn more and yet the stories just end there. All the women in the stories have their struggles - rape, racism, patriarchy that's dismissive towards women, poverty, gender and sexuality, and plain old young adults trying to figure themelves out. I have become cynical of young adults with all their "passion and energy", I guess because I feel more and more less young.

One of the character in the story is non-binary, I think. I'm not sure. I don't think s/he's transgender and they use they as their pronoun, so non-binary? This is my issue. Brace for what's perhaps an intolerant opinion. I fully understand if you're physically born male and feel like a female and vice versa. I also get if you don't feel like male or female 100% and more like in between or feel more like a combination of both which is what I understand non-binary to be. All those are fine, but then with non-binary I do not like the pronoun "they" for them because why are you plural? You're still a single person and I get that "it" will be condescending, but whenever I read "they" to describe a single person, it's very disorienting. I know, why should they sacrifice for my benefit, but then the same argument can be made, why should people like me sacrifice for your benefit? I have to admit that I also roll my eyes at what I think is a trend of "common" people (I cannot use normal, right) who like to state what their pronoun should be on their bio. Like what?!? Why is this an issue, why does this have to be front and center? I thought we don't like label. Then I also realized it's a limitation or perhaps a feature of the English language that is limiting. You use he / she / it while in Indonesian, to describe a single third person, you just use Dia which is genderless or should we still be using Mereka for non-binary people to follow the plural they in English? Again why are you oocupying multiple spaces? But then I also think that in Indonesian, most of the time and in a formal setting you need the Mrs / Mr (Ibu / Bapak) to describe an older person or a person in higher position and then what are you gonna do with non-binary people? I just googled, apparently in English, you can use Mx and it's pronounced Mixter. So in Indonesian, what are we going to do? Bupak? Pakbu? Does it matter if the Bapak comes before the Ibu? Gosh, so many things to consider to ensure it's all politically correct.

Googling also shows me that in Indonesian Bugis culture, they have long accepted people who is of a third gender. I actually have heard of this long ago. What is a third gender? I don't know; third gender and non-binary have separate Wikipedia pages though they sound kinda the same to me. Human evolves, right. I mean it's undeniable, it's science. So if human evolves from the past to now, we're definitely evolving to the future as well. I guess to be inside that evolution and seeing it, seeing how things are being raised, discussed, coming into forms or different forms and not fully getting it, you just ... you just have thoughts. Bottom line though, regardless of what the person is, always and always try to treat them with kindness and respect and I know that is a way too easy thing to say. Like it happens to many of us, when you come across someone you don't like, well fuck kindness ;) Anyways, next I am reading The Topeka School.

On other news, mom has received her first shot of the COVID-19 vaccine, oh what a relief. In Indonesia, in the midst of things not working, some things do work. My family was like registering in many places to get a slot for the vaccine. Mom was registered in 3 different places. The day before her shot, in the morning my brother received confirmation for the shot some weeks away and then in the afternoon, they received confirmation for the shot in another place for the next day and she took that appointment. So somehow things work. I was surprised because it felt sudden. Then I was even more surprised when one my good friend, Emilia, said her mother is getting her second shot next week. So somehow things can move fast in Indonesia. That being said my cousin still hasn't gotten confirmation for her parents. Anyways, all went well for mom. She had concerns because on the day of her shot, she saw that everyone were Indonesian Chinese except for one muslim girl bringing her parents. Considering the majority of Indonesians are muslims, if the take-up rate from this demographic is low, then things will not get better. I don't know if there's vaccine hesitancy or they just think the process is a hassle, having to register here and there, and the older people do not have younger people to whom they can ask to register for them online. All and all, I hope the vaccination process in Indonesia is getting more efficient and reaching more and more people. As for me, I don't know when I'm going to get my vaccine. I thought Singapore will be fast and efficient, so it is rather strange that my mom was able to get it first, but it's all good that she did.

:) eKa @ 7:30:00 PM •