Like Nothing Happened

So election was yesterday and today it feels to me like nothing happened. It's like a same old Saturday. Nothing does change, the ruling party won majority and they actually did much better than the last election. That was surprising to me. What does this mean? So after all the talk about too many foreigners here in Singapore, Singaporeans are okay with it? The whole CPF issue thingy is not an issue for them? For those who are not familiar with the term, CPF is what I call simply as retirement fund. Singaporeans and permanent residents here have 20% of their salary transferred to CPF automatically compulsorily and they also receive an additional 15% contribution from their employers. The government have been putting a lot of restriction on when and how you can take out this money and this has been highlighted a lot by the opposition parties. If I'm a citizen of this country, this would be the issue that matters the most, but yeah the ruling party won and garnered more support, so I don't know what's in the mind of Singaporeans. Their win is expected but the higher support was something that I didn't expect. Still, perhaps what's more surprising for me than the result is the fact that the parties' posters and such haven't been taken down yet, 2 days after end of campaign. Singapore is usually fast in cleaning up and yet they're still here. That is shocking.

So as the title of the post says, it's like nothing happened and in a way it's right. Mom texted me asking how it went because it didn't make the news in Indonesia. It's rather sad I have to say, it's like it doesn't matter. As I took my bus to Orchard today and I saw the posters for the F1 race next week which has been around for a long time, I thought of how Singapore now will get busy dealing with this. It's ironic that these posters have been there longer than the posters from the elections. It's like this kinda thing is more important to Singapore than choosing its government. It makes me think that sometime these are always the more important things in Singapore. The hungry ghost festival is not over yet and the shops have been busy promoting their moon cakes. It's like when Christmas is over, there are many malls that quickly change their decoration for Chinese New Year. It's rather frightening. It's always about making more and more money and not about slowing down and trying to just experience things.

Anyway, enough about Singapore. Today after class, I thought about how the weekend is ending and a new week is starting. I started to feel awful just thinking about it. Last year my dad told me not to travel far this year because based on the Chinese horoscope, this is not a good year for me. So they were rather dismayed when I disobeyed them and went the furthest I've been anywhere, America. Today I thought about how that trip was the best time I had this year and how I actually was safer there physically mentally than the days I've been spending here. These past few months, I've been dealing with one sickness after another. I still have a lot of wrong things with my body, it's like my body is collapsing from the inside :( I like to think they cells inside of me just cannot take all the shittyness I've been having, It's one shitty thing after another, one pressure after another, one shitty people after another. I have had a lot of hatred brewing inside of me and I know it's unkind, but I can't help it. I think of why can't things just go my way, be easier for me, and then when I prayed yesterday at the temple, the thought came that perhaps God has ward off worse things coming my way and though right now things may seem like they're just one shit after another, perhaps I've actually been getting the easier things. I don't know. I want to get out of this alright and I'll be damn pissed if after all this I found myself being burned. As I wrote that, the Indonesian word "ikhlas" came. It's the word which I can't find the equivalent in English. When Indonesian kids are taught this word, we're taught that when we do good things to other people, we should do it without expecting anything in return, to be ikhlas. Right now, I'm definitely not in that state of mind. So basically peeps, how am I doing? I'm not doing well mentally and physically and I just want people to get away from me.

On a nicer story, I started to watch Sense8 and how I love it so much. When I first watched it, I got this LOST vibe on it, another TV series that I like. I've only half way of season 1 and already I feel sad that this will be over soon and I have to wait long for the new season. It'll be like the big void I had when I finished watching The Following. Sense8 is really interesting and I'm adequately unable to explain what it's about. From what I have learned so far, it's about these 8 people across the world who could feel what the other are feeling and tap to each other's ability. If I have one thing that I would like to have preferred is for the characters to use their own languages, instead of English being used throughout in countries like Germany, India, and Mexico. However I guess it's because the writers are unable to to write in these local languages and if they hand it over to the translators, the nuances may be lost. It's really good peeps, do watch it if you have access to it. I also went to the cinema yesterday and I watched Me and Earl and the Dying Girl. It's really good. It's not a blockbuster or anything but movies like this are really worth watching. It has a nice sad story and it's very meaningful. I like it a lot.

:) eKa @ 5:02:00 PM •

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