Reading Differently

Today in Italian class, the topic was still about movies and I told the class that the last Italian movie that I watched was probably Italy: Love It or Leave It. I said I like the movie because I find it very interesting the different sides of Italy that the movie gives. Usually foreigners will see Italy as this wonderful beautiful place, but this documentary gives a more real view of Italy. I said those in a not very articulate Italian, but basically that's why I love it. It was refreshing for me when I watched this documentary and obviously since the film makers decided to show these sides, they know that these issues exist and it's pretty encouraging that they are bringing to the front things which they deem are wrong or bad because this shows that there are people who are in tunes about things that are wrong and that there are people who are not ignorant. It's important because by understanding things that don't work, only then can we start to find a way to fix them. Now that I wrote that, I'm thinking why I didn't say this when I was explaining why I like that movie. Anyways, another girl has also watched the movie and she didn't like it because she said it showed a lot of bad sides of Italy and for the title of Love it or Leave it, the documentary does not give a balance argument to each side. All seems to point out to leave it. The documentary itself was somewhat came to fruition because the couple who made the movie was at the point of deciding if they want to leave Italy. The couple was this Italian and a non Italian. The Italian was feeling heavyhearted about leaving but as they explored Italy more, they realized it's getting harder to find a way to love it wholeheartedly. In the end though, they chose to stay. I guess it kinda resonates with me too because I still love Indonesia though when I look into it, there's just more and more things that I hate about it, but here I am still keeping my citizenship. I have to say, I think it's easier for me to say I love Indonesia since I'm not living in it. If I live in it and I have to deal with the shit day in and day out, I may say differently.

So anyway it got me thinking of how I view things and hence the title above. Does it seem that I am the pessimistic one? I mean I know I am. The glass is half empty for me all the time. I just feel like I prefer thing to be told in all its sides rather than be sugar coated to make it easier to swallow. It's a strange thing to say considering I don't like getting the necessary harsh truth. In fact, I always get stressed out when I have to deal with inconvenient truth. That being said, I don't know, I guess I would still rather choose to know all the bad sides first. It's like the bad sides are more important since that way you would really know what you're getting into. The good sides are more like a bonus. Maybe this only makes sense to me? Anyway, next week is the last Italian class. What are we gonna do next year? I have no idea. In this downward mood, I have no desire to do anything :( This week, there's indication that the thing that I don't want to happen may happen and the stress is building again :( I'm trying to pull it together, but I just can't really control my mind. It's all so screwed up. I often can't sleep on many nights now. Sunday night is not the worst anymore, there are many nights like that these days. Mom wishes for me to be more relaxed. Perhaps I shouldn't be so stubborn in how I read things and take another view of the situation. Obviously the way I have been looking at things only sends me spiraling deeper into the dark hole so perhaps a more positive read on things could lift me up. I always say I can't control how I think or feel. I know for sure it's not correct since many people have testified on their ability to control how they think and feel and the good thing it does to them. It's a matter of wanting to do it and be disciplined about it. I got it right when I used the word "stubborn" up there since I stubbornly holding on to how I have been feeling instead of trying to change it. You know what they say, "if you cannot change the situation, you can change how you feel about it". I don't know why I can't bring myself to be positive or even just try to be positive.

Moving on to stranger stuff. In Italian class today, one of the girls in class said, "I don't know who Anthony Hopkins is". WHAT??!?! Another one then asked who Susan Sarandon is. I know it's rude, but in those 2 instances, I was like openly, "hah?". I mean like, you girls live in a city, come on! Then I was thinking, darn it Eka, there are people like that. No matter how easy it is for them to access information, they will just not use it to fill things into their brains and it's not like these things are that important and you know one of them has a husband, the other has a hot boyfriend (so the class was informed last week) and what do you have Eka? What do you get with all these information in your brain? Yeah, I got nothing. So we're moving on to other topic now. I was ambivalent about it, but in the end I decided to just go watch Frozen after class today. It's just it's been awhile since I've been in a cinema. It's actually only been like 2 weeks. Anyway, there isn't any movie which is like calling to me these past few weeks, but then I thought I should just go and as I entered the cinema hall, I realized how I really do like movies. I want to bring this to your attention, the thing about watching a cartoon in a cinema is that there are many little kids and darn they're noisy! I think the thing I hate more than their talking, screaming, and comments is the parents who let them do it. Arrrrgghhh. I observed that today it's the Asian kids who are doing it all. There were westerner kids and somehow they know to just sit and watch the movie without making noise. What's wrong with these Asian parents?!?!? Though I have to say, the most annoying mom I've encountered was the mom who brought her young kids to watch Midnight in Paris. She let the kids run around in the cinema hall. I was ready to murder her.

Anyway, Frozen was delightfully wonderful. I love it very much. Most surprised with Kristen Bell. She sounded so different. I was in disbelief that it's her. There's not a trace of her Gossip Girl voice. I am also most surprised that she can sing really well. The songs, I have to say, are one of the part that makes this movie great. It really gives a Disney feel to the whole thing, although I have to point out that I have mix feeling about the lyric of the songs and the musical style. I love all the songs, I don't hate them, but I wonder if they're really just gonna be bad without the modernized pop feel in the melody and the lyrics. Like if the lyrics were more poetic instead of more current to adapt to how people these days speak, would they make the songs not as easily loved? I don't know if you get me. Anyway, back to the movie. Totally didn't see the twist coming though as it was revealed I did have an inkling on how the story will be resolved and I was kinda right. Glad that I went to watch it :) Feel like finding the songs so that I can put them on loop :) Okay guys, that's all I have so far. Darn, it's always much better in my head of the things that I want to say but when the time comes to write it, I couldn't pin them down anymore or make a good connection from one thought to another to make a fluid composition :( Hope your days will be great. I hope nothing bad will fall on me, but I can only pray and pray for that :( How I wish I can be happier.

:) eKa @ 8:35:00 PM •

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