Off to Rehab and Detox

Gonna go home today. I hope I can make it alright because my passport is actually expiring in less than 3 months. I hope I can make it back to Jakarta. I am not so concerned about not being able to come back to Singapore. I was telling NanSee just now how unlucky I have been these days. I think I am so battered and wounded in my life right now. I really need to go home. If I am a character in a game, my lifeline is diminishing fast. I could feel it when I woke up this morning, like my energy is really running out fast. So I really really hope, I can reach home in one piece.

This week has been pretty scary. Something really really bad and wrong happens in my body. I should be seeing a doctor but I didn't. I guess simply because I am scared to see her and get diagnosed and if it's of concern (which it is actually), I have to go through more tests and with that the ultimate bad news may come my way :'( I know I should't be ignoring the fact that something is really wrong with my body, but I am. I am hoping that it will be okay on its own soon :( I am not supposed to do this, really. I was seeking comfort from googling, which is so WRONG! I mean if such thing happens to you, I will urge you to see a doctor. It's just of all the so many things I can do and should do alone, I really don't want to do this alone :'( Anyways, I've told my mom. So if it's not getting better back home, at least I have the whole family there to help me get through what it is I need to get through.

Well nothing much else to say. I wish you guys a Happy Chinese New Year!!! Happy holidays! As usual I am pretty depressed thinking that I have to go back here. Aaarrrgghhh. For now, I am just so comforted thinking about dinner and my nice bed. Finally I will be able to sleep. Take care peeps. See you when I see you.

:) eKa @ 12:21:00 PM •


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