Saturday, April 19, 2008

Amazement in Age + Losing My Mojo

I have to say there was not just 1 reason when I started my Saturday engagement. One of the reason I had was simply to have a life outside the life that I had and to get to know new people. There was silly hope on the people whom I hoped to meet. I have to say unfortunately none of the vision that I had come true. However fortunately I can say it is more interesting to meet all the people I met, that God is always more amusing than what our mind can conjure. I was planning to give some sort of summary or my opinion of the different characters whom I have encountered, but laziness manages to stop that thought.

However today I am going to write about a particular grandfather whom I found to be so cool. Today he found out that I'm actually an Indonesian (recently more people think that I am a Singaporean on first encounter, but that's another story altogether). So during the break, he said, "So you're Indonesian?". "Yes, I am", I said, grinning I may add. I just love being Indonesian. He said that "Oh, I spent 7 years there". He said he was there between 1962 to 1969 informing me that it was during the Soekarno era. I actually knew that. My first reaction was "Really? Oh my God! You were there in 1965!". "Yes", he said. He elaborated that he was there during the revolution. To which, I could only say "Oh my God, oh my God!" which I think made me looked like some brainless girl, which perhaps made him think that I was not interested with stories. I actually do! I have never met anyone from that time. The time of some of the most historical moments in Indonesia. I asked why he was there, what he was doing. It seemed he was involved in the building of Hotel Indonesia. Seriously, I was totally in a stunned mode that I couldn't stop saying "Oh My God!". I know that perhaps I should learn to be more brainy. I seriously hope in weeks to come, I could get him to tell stories about his stay in Indonesia, about that period. I really really really want to hear as much stories as he could give me. I hope such chance would come. One knows I lack social skill and my interrogative methods could be annoying.

I really found this grandfather to be so cool and how I wish when I reach his age, I too will have interesting stories to tell, that my life experience would great. On the short term wish, I do wish when I reach 30, I could be as amazing as the many people in their early 30s whom I met. To see what they have achieved in their age now is kinda inspiring for me. I do not have much time left to make much difference. With my lazy bones, it is highly likely that I am still where I am 4 years from now, which I seriously hope not. I suppose one of these days I really am going to get tired with my life that I will make drastic changes. Pray for me, peeps.

On personal life update. I don't feel that this week has been a productive one for me. Yesterday I found out that I miss something, which made me feel rather pissed off with myself though the point in which I realize the mistake was nothing short of a spark of brilliance. Everyone is not perfect, not everyone could be on point all the time. People have their mistake moments, however I am still quite bothered when I'm not performing well in situations when I should. Losing my mojo it seems. I don't know if one should read much into it. I don't know if I should read much into little things or coincidences which I feel is happening recently. I should repeat the mantra, "If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it".

[added 12:22 AM]
Movie of the week is Hotel Rwanda which I just finished watching. It was really really really good and I would recommend all of you to watch it. The actors were great and Don Cheadle was of course nominated for Oscar in 2005 but didn't get it. The point was of course not about the greatness of the actors or whether the movie was entertaining and had a good storyline. The movie was based on a true story and to ask whether it was entertaining would be so disgraceful. The movie was heartbreaking for me. I had some tears. I couldn't help being thankful for the life that I have and as often happen when I watch this kinda movie, I wonder why such fate could happen in this world. Couldn't help wondering why God could let it happen. It's easy to say that everything is in God's plan when you have such a safe secure life. I wonder if I can still have such strong faith if I have to endure what the Rwandans endured. This kinda movie also often makes me feel rather embarrassed for getting so worked up with trivial things in my daily life when we could do so much more, save the world and do something good for other people. I totally recommend this movie to all of you peeps!

:) eKa @ 9:30:00 PM •