Total Self Absorption

Not much to tell really. Didn't do anything interesting this week. No movie, though I feel like going to watch at least 1 next week (alone hopefully). Did go for dinner yesterday, il Gatto's birthday dinner. I left the peeps before dessert though because I was just too tired. Managed to go and pray this morning and managed to made it in just in time. I am really not in a good spirit that I didn't want a McDonalds breakfast this morning.

The weather has been wicked. It rains way too much and I always feel cold. I can feel the wind going inside me and to still be standing is surprising. In addition to being cold, I feel tired and somehow more anti social than ever? I'm just too tired and gosh I hope I will not have to really shout "non me ne frega niente!!!". I simply don't care, I couldn't care less! I don't want to know and I do not want to listen. I want a "me" time. I wish everyone well and for those who ask me to pray, be it for their work or their relationship, I do wish that things will work out for you people. I'm sorry that I do not pray as much as I could, but I do really wish things will work out for you.

Miss the talk with the Mr or the emails at least but I know we both have less energy to do so. Miss the other Mr as well, whom I left a message weeks ago and didn't get any reply. Miss Vivy and can't wait for her to come back because I really need that sensible voice. However to wish for her to come back soon will be bad because given the opportunity to stay longer, she should take it. I am perhaps selfish wanting these people so that I can talk about my misery to them, exactly the things that I hate from the people who are doing it to me. Perhaps these people are already getting tired with me themselves, yes Mr? I miss their sensible and comical comments, even though their truth are hard to swallow sometime but they are right. You are right, Mr.

For now, I just have to make do waiting for Rista to come next week, even only for a few hours. At least I get to talk to someone who is not ... well who at least is an Indonesian who knows me and perhaps has the slightest interest in getting to know how I am, really. I put really in that sentence because sometime I feel the people who asked me how I am (to be honest not many because many are wrapped up in their things) basically just want to know the drama and after half listening, they don't really give comforting and encouraging words. I know because I did try confiding to some people and all I get is basically merda. Take care peeps!

:) eKa @ 11:58:00 PM •


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