Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Ignorance

Perhaps it would be best to start by saying "I'm sorry" to Orlando, JTG, Felis, Vivy, and Boon Kiat for the trouble that I caused them yesterday morning. I'm pretty sure they won't be reading this, so my apology is a waste?

In my last post, I said that I think my computer needs a new memory. I guess it still does but it turns out that my dear beloved can still manage (for now) without the need for a new memory. What happened was, yesterday morning I was bugging Felis and Boon Kiat asking them to confirm what type of model my laptop is (we all have the same model). Yes, it is ignorant for not knowing that myself. I bugged Orlando and JTG for advice in changing memory. Orlando did it once; it was really nice of him to answer my call and give me extensive advice. JTG even called me back when he couldn't reach me in msn. His advice was to format my computer first, just like Vivy's advice. Both Orlando and JTG told me to check out my computer's specification thoroughly before I change the memory.

This is where my ignorance appeared. I went to look in my big box, clues that may lead me to knowing my laptop better. Ignorance is when after 4 years since I first got my laptop, yesterday was the first time I was reading the manual. I found out that I was given some useful CDs. All of which haven't been touched, still wrapped in their nice plastics. Okay, I am ashamed. Perhaps I am less ignorant for still keeping them? And not throwing them away? I know, I know, no excuse should be made for being so ignorant. Looking back, I guess I was not being myself in my first year in NUS. I have regret about that semester even though people say don't have regret in life. The regret was not doing my best and just played a lot. It's not like I think that my life would have been a whole lot better if I had studied more. The regret is about letting go completely. My friends in primary school, junior high, and high school wouldn't have believed me if I told them that I was skipping classes, that I didn't even try to do my tutorial, that I gave up without trying because I thought I knew I couldn't do it. That is so not me. I wasn't ignorant like that and yet in my first semester I was so ignorant about school. Action-Reaction, I deserved what I got. The irony was, perhaps my NUS friends think that's just the way I am. So getting to the end of my year in NUS, they started saying that I'm changing. The truth is: school matter to me, knowing all is matter to me. I know that it's impossible to know all, but I'm striving for it. I'm not saying I'm not changing because recently Meylyana said I didn't feel like the me she knew. I'm changing, everybody changes. I'm changing in ways that I want them to be, but I still do want to keep little part of me that I have before. You know what, I guess no one really know who Eka is. You gotta exchange notes to really know me.

Okay...Anyway, about my computer. I used the DVD cd which was given to me with the laptop. Installed whatever thing that was there and my computer still couldn't play dvd. I found a driver in NEC website yesterday, I thought it wouldn't help but it was the "thing". My computer can play dvd now and there's no necessity for a computer re-formatting or a new memory. My dear beloved steady and dependable laptop. I hope it can survive for some time

:) eKa @ 2:39:00 PM •